The Book of the Thousand Nights and a Night, Volume 6

R >> Richard F. Burton >> The Book of the Thousand Nights and a Night, Volume 6

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The King and his Wazir's Wife.[FN#160]

There was once a King of the Kings, a potent man and a proud, who
was devoted to the love of women and one day being in the privacy
of his palace, he espied a beautiful woman on the terraceroof of
her house and could not contain himself from falling consumedly
in love with her.[FN#161] He asked his folk to whom the house and
the damsel belonged and they said, "This is the dwelling of the
Wazir such an one and she is his wife." So he called the Minister
in question and despatched him on an errand to a distant part of
the kingdom, where he was to collect information and to return;
but, as soon as he obeyed and was gone, the King contrived by a
trick to gain access to his house and his spouse. When the
Wazir's wife saw him, she knew him and springing up, kissed his
hands and feet and welcomed him. Then she stood afar off, busying
herself in his service, and said to him, "O our lord, what is the
cause of thy gracious coming? Such an honour is not for the like
of me." Quoth he, "The cause of it is that love of thee and
desire thee-wards have moved me to this. Whereupon she kissed
ground before him a second time and said, "By Allah, O our lord,
indeed I am not worthy to be the handmaid of one of the King's
servants; whence then have I the great good fortune to be in such
high honour and favour with thee?" Then the King put out his hand
to her intending to enjoy her person, when she said, "This thing
shall not escape us; but take patience, O my King, and abide with
thy handmaid all this day, that she may make ready for thee
somewhat to eat and drink." So the King sat down on his
Minister's couch and she went in haste and brought him a book
wherein he might read, whilst she made ready the food. He took
the book and, beginning to read, found therein moral instances
and exhortations, such as restrained him from adultery and broke
his courage to commit sin and crime. After awhile, she returned
and set before him some ninety dishes of different kinds of
colours, and he ate a mouthful of each and found that, while the
number was many, the taste of them was one. At this, he marvelled
with exceeding marvel and said to her, "O damsel, I see these
meats to be manifold and various, but the taste of them is simple
and the same." "Allah prosper the King!" replied she, "this is a
parable I have set for thee, that thou mayst be admonished
thereby." He asked, "And what is its meaning?"; and she answered,
"Allah amend the case of our lord the King!; in thy palace are
ninety concubines of various colours, but their taste is
one."[FN#162] When the King heard this, he was ashamed and rising
hastily, went out, without offering her any affront and returned
to his palace; but, in his haste and confusion, he forgot his
signet-ring and left it under the cushion where he had been
sitting and albeit he remembered it he was ashamed to send for
it. Now hardly had he reached home when the Wazir returned and,
presenting himself before the King, kissed the ground and made
his report to him of the state of the province in question. Then
he repaired to his own house and sat down on his couch and
chancing to put his hand under the cushion, behold, he found the
King's seal-ring. So he knew it and taking the matter to heart,
held aloof in great grief from his wife for a whole year, not
going in unto her nor even speaking to her, whilst she knew not
the reason of his anger. --And Shahrazad perceived the dawn of
day and ceased saying her permitted say.

When it was the Five Hundred and Seventy-ninth Night,

She said, It hath reached me, O auspicious King, that the Wazir
held aloof from his wife, whilst she knew not the cause of his
wrath. At last, being weary of the longsome neglect, she sent for
her sire and told him the case; whereupon quoth he, "I will
complain of him to the King, at some time when he is in the
presence." So, one day, he went in to the King and, finding the
Wazir and the Kazi of the army before him,[FN#163] complained
thus saying, "Almighty Allah amend the King's case! I had a fair
flower-garden, which I planted with mine own hand and thereon
spent my substance till it bare fruit; and its fruitage was ripe
for plucking, when I gave it to this thy Wazir, who ate of it
what seemed good to him, then deserted it and watered it not, so
that its bloom wilted and withered and its sheen departed and its
state changed." Then said the Wazir, "O my King, this man saith
sooth. I did indeed care for and guard the garden and kept it in
good condition and ate thereof, till one day I went thither and I
saw the trail of the lion there, wherefore I feared for my life
and withdrew from the garden." The King understood him that the
trail of the lion meant his own seal-ring, which he had forgotten
in the woman's house; so he said, "Return, O Wazir, to thy
flower-garden and fear nothing, for the lion came not near it. It
hath reached me that he went thither; but, by the honour of my
fathers and forefathers, he offered it no hurt." "Hearkening and
obedience," answered the Minister and, returning home sent for
his wife and made his peace with her and thenceforth put faith in
her chastity. "This I tell thee, O King (continued the Wazir),
for no other purpose save to let thee know how great is their
craft and how precipitancy bequeatheth repentance.[FN#164] And I
have also heard the following

Story of the Confectioner, his Wife, and the Parrot.

Once upon a time there dwelt in Egypt a confectioner who had a
wife famed for beauty and loveliness; and a parrot which, as
occasion required, did the office of watchman and guard, bell and
spy, and flapped her wings did she but hear a fly buzzing about
the sugar. This parrot caused abundant trouble to the wife,
always telling her husband what took place in his absence. Now
one evening, before going out to visit certain friends, the
confectioner gave the bird strict injunctions to watch all night
and bade his wife make all fast, as he should not return until
morning. Hardly had he left the door than the woman went for her
old lover, who returned with her and they passed the night
together in mirth and merriment, while the parrot observed all.
Betimes in the morning the lover fared forth and the husband,
returning, was informed by the parrot of what had taken place;
whereupon he hastened to his wife's room and beat her with a
painful beating. She thought in herself, "Who could have informed
against me?" and she asked a woman that was in her confidence
whether it was she. The woman protested by the worlds visible and
invisible that she had not betrayed her mistress; but informed
her that on the morning of his return home, the husband had stood
some time before the cage listening to the parrot's talk. When
the wife heard this, she resolved to contrive the destruction of
the bird. Some days after, the husband was again invited to the
house of a friend where he was to pass the night; and, before
departing, he enjoined the parrot with the same injunctions as
before; wherefore his heart was free from care, for he had his
spy at home. The wife and her confidante then planned how they
might destroy the credit of the parrot with the master. For this
purpose they resolved to counterfeit a storm; and this they did
by placing over the parrot's head a hand-mill (which the lover
worked by pouring water upon a piece of hide), by waving a fan
and by suddenly uncovering a candle hid under a dish. Thus did
they raise such a tempest of rain and lightning, that the parrot
was drenched and half-drowned in a deluge. Now rolled the
thunder, then flashed the lightning; that from the noise of the
hand-mill, this from the reflection of the candle; when thought
the parrot to herself, "In very sooth the flood hath come on,
such an one as belike Noah himself never witnessed." So saying
she buried her head under her wing, a prey to terror. The
husband, on his return, hastened to the parrot to ask what had
happened during his absence; and the bird answered that she found
it impossible to describe the deluge and tempest of the last
night; and that years would be required to explain the uproar of
the hurricane and storm. When the shopkeeper heard the parrot
talk of last night's deluge, he said: "Surely O bird, thou art
gone clean daft! Where was there, even in a dream, rain or
lightning last night? Thou hast utterly ruined my house and
ancient family. My wife is the most virtuous woman of the age and
all thine accusations of her are lies." So in his wrath he dashed
the cage upon the ground, tore off the parrot's head, and threw
it from the window. Presently his friend, coming to call upon
him, saw the parrot in this condition with head torn off, and
without wings or plumage. Being informed of the circumstances he
suspected some trick on the part of the woman, and said to the
husband, "When your wife leaves home to go to the Hammam-bath,
compel her confidante to disclose the secret." So as soon as his
wife went out, the husband entered his Harim and insisted on the
woman telling him the truth. She recounted the whole story and
the husband now bitterly repented having killed the parrot, of
whose innocence he had proof. "This I tell thee, O King
(continued the Wazir), that thou mayst know how great are the
craft and malice of women and that to act in haste leadeth to
repent at leisure." So the King turned from slaying his son: but,
next day, the favourite came in to him and, kissing the ground
before him, said, "O King, why dost thou delay to do me justice?
Indeed, the Kings have heard that thou commandest a thing and thy
Wazir countermandeth it. Now the obedience of Kings is in the
fulfilment of their commandments, and every one knows thy justice
and equity: so do thou justice for me on the Prince. I also have
heard tell a tale concerning

The Fuller and his Son.

There was once a man which was a fuller, and he used every day to
go forth to the Tigris-bank a-cleaning clothes; and his son was
wont to go with him that he might swim whilst his father was
fulling, nor was he forbidden from this. One day, as the boy was
swimming,[FN#165] he was taken with cramp in the forearms and
sank, whereupon the fuller plunged into the water and caught hold
of him; but the boy clung about him and pulled him down and so
father and son were both drowned. "Thus it is with thee, O King.
Except thou prevent thy son and do me justice on him, I fear lest
both of you sink together, thou and he."--And Shahrazad perceived
the dawn of day and ceased to say her permitted say.

When it Was the Five Hundred and Eightieth Night,

She said, It hath reached me, O auspicious King, that when the
favourite had told her tale of the Fuller and his son, she ended
with, "I fear lest both of you sink together, thou and he.
Moreover," continued she, "for an instance of the malice of men,
I have heard tell a tale concerning

The Rake's Trick against the Chaste Wife.

A certain man loved a beautiful and lovely woman, a model of
charms and grace, married to a man whom she loved and who loved
her. Moreover, she was virtuous and chaste, like unto me, and her
rake of a lover found no way to her; so when his patience was at
an end, he devised a device to win his will. Now the husband had
a young man, whom he had brought up in his house and who was in
high trust with him as his steward. So the rake addressed himself
to the youth and ceased not insinuating himself into his favour
by presents and fair words and deeds, till he became more
obedient to him than the hand to the mouth and did whatever he
ordered him. One day, he said to him, "Harkye, such an one; wilt
thou not bring me into the family dwelling-place some time when
the lady is gone out?" "Yes," answered the young steward so, when
his master was at the shop and his mistress gone forth to the
Hammam, he took his friend by the hand and, bringing him into the
house, showed him the sitting-rooms and all that was therein. Now
the lover was determined to play a trick upon the woman; so he
took the white of an egg which he had brought with him in a
vessel, and spilt it on the merchant's bedding, unseen by the
young man; after which he returned thanks and leaving the house
went his way. In an hour or so the merchant came home; and, going
to the bed to rest himself, found thereon something wet. So he
took it up in his hand and looked at it and deemed it man's seed;
whereat he stared at the young man with eyes of wrath, and asked
him, "Where is thy mistress?"; and he answered, "She is gone
forth to the Hammam and will return forthright after she has made
her ablutions."[FN#166] When the man heard this, his suspicion
concerning the semen was confirmed; and he waxed furious and
said, "Go at once and bring her back." The steward accordingly
fetched her and when she came before her husband, the jealous man
sprang upon her and beat her a grievous beating; then, binding
her arms behind her, offered to cut her throat with a knife; but
she cried out to the neighbours, who came to her, and she said to
them, "This my man hath beaten me unjustly and without cause and
is minded to kill me, though I know not what is mine offence." So
they rose up and asked him, "Why hast thou dealt thus by her?"
And he answered, "She is divorced." Quoth they, "Thou hast no
right to maltreat her; either divorce her or use her kindly, for
we know her prudence and purity and chastity. Indeed, she hath
been our neighbour this long time and we wot no evil of her."
Quoth he, "When I came home, I found on my bed seed like human
sperm, and I know not the meaning of this." Upon this a little
boy, one of those present, came forward and said, "Show it to me,
nuncle mine!" When he saw it, he smelt it and, calling for fire
and a frying-pan, he took the white of egg and cooked it so that
it became solid. Then he ate of it and made the husband and the
others taste if it, and they were certified that it was white of
egg. So the husband was convinced that he had sinned against his
wife's innocence, she being clear of all offence, and the
neighbours made peace between them after the divorce, and he
prayed her pardon and presented her with an hundred gold pieces.
And so the wicked lover's cunning trick came to naught. "And
know, O King, that this is an instance of the malice of men and
their perfidy." When the King heard this, he bade his son be
slain; but on the next day the second Wazir came forward for
intercession and kissed ground in prostration. Whereupon the King
said, "Raise thy head: prostration must be made to Allah
only."[FN#167] So the Minister rose from before him and said, "O
King, hasten not to slay thy son, for he was not granted to his
mother by the Almighty but after despair, nor didst thou expect
such good luck; and we hope that he will live to become a guerdon
to thy reign and a guardian of thy good. Wherefore, have
patience, O King; belike he will offer a fit excuse; and, if thou
make haste to slay him, thou wilt surely repent, even as the
merchant-wight repented." Asked the King, "And how was it with
the merchant, O Wazir?"; and the Wazir answered, "O King, I have
heard a tale of

The Miser and the Loaves of Bread.

There was once a merchant, who was a niggard and miserly in his
eating and drinking. One day, he went on a journey to a certain
town and as he walked in the market-streets, behold, he met an
old trot with two scones of bread which looked sound and fair, He
asked her, "Are these for sale?"; and she answered, "Yes!" So he
beat her down and bought them at the lowest price and took them
home to his lodging, where he ate them that day. When morning
morrowed, he returned to the same place and, finding the old
woman there with other two scones, bought these also; and thus he
ceased not during twenty-five days' space when the old wife
disappeared. He made enquiry for her, but could hear no tidings
of her, till, one day as he was walking about the high streets,
he chanced upon her: so he accosted her and, after the usual
salutation and with much praise and politeness, asked why she had
disappeared from the market and ceased to supply the two cakes of
bread? Hearing this, at first she evaded giving him a reply; but
he conjured her to tell him her case; so she said, "Hear my
excuse, O my lord, which is that I was attending upon a man who
had a corroding ulcer on his spine, and his doctor bade us knead
flour with butter into a plaster and lay it on the place of pain,
where it abode all night. In the morning, I used to take that
flour and turn it into dough and make it into two scones, which I
cooked and sold to thee or to another; but presently the man died
and I was cut off from making cakes."[FN#168] When the merchant
heard this, he repented whenas repentance availed him naught,
saying, "Verily, we are Allah's and verily unto Him we are
returning! There is no Majesty and there is no Might save in Him,
the Glorious, the Great!" --And Shahrazad perceived the dawn of
day and ceased saying her permitted say.

When it was the Five Hundred and Eighty-first Night,

She said, It hath reached me, O auspicious King, that when the
old trot told the merchant the provenance of the scones, he
cried, "There is no Majesty and there is no Might save in Allah,
the Glorious, the Great!" And he repeated the saying of the Most
High, "Whatever evil falleth to thee it is from thyself;"[FN#169]
and vomited till he fell sick and repented whenas repentance
availed him naught. "Moreover, O King" (continued the second
Wazir), "I have heard tell, of the malice of women, a tale of

The Lady and her Two Lovers.

Once upon a time there was a man, who was sword-bearer to one of
the Kings, and he loved a damsel of the common sort. One day, he
sent his page to her with a message, as of wont between them, and
the lad sat down with her and toyed with her. She inclined to him
and pressed him to her breast and groped him and kissed him
whereupon he sought carnal connection of her and she consented;
but, as the two were thus, lo! the youth's master knocked at the
door. So she pushed the page through a trapdoor into an
underground chamber there and opened the door to his lord, who
entered hending sword in hand and sat down upon her bed. Then she
came up to him and sported and toyed with him, kissing him and
pressing him to her bosom, and he took her and lay with her.
Presently, her husband knocked at the door and the gallant asked
her, "Who is that?"; whereto she answered, "My husband." Quoth
he, "How shall I do?" Quoth she, "Draw thy sword and stand in the
vestibule and abuse me and revile me; and when my husband comes
in to thee, do thou go forth and wend thy ways." He did as she
bade him; and, when the husband entered, he saw the King's
sword-bearer standing with naked brand in hand, abusing and
threatening his wife; but, when the lover saw him, he was ashamed
and sheathing his scymitar, went forth the house. Said the man to
his wife, "What means this?"; and she replied, "O man, how
blessed is the hour of thy coming! Thou hast saved a True
Believer from slaughter, and it happed after this fashion. I was
on the house-terrace, spinning,[FN#170] when behold, there came
up to me a youth, distracted and panting for fear of death,
fleeing from yonder man, who followed upon him as hard as he
could with his drawn sword. The young man fell down before me,
and kissed my hands and feet, saying, "O Protector, of thy mercy,
save me from him who would slay me wrongously!" So I hid him in
that underground chamber of ours and presently in came yonder man
to me, naked brand in hand, demanding the youth. But I denied him
to him, whereupon he fell to abusing and threatening me as thou
sawest. And praised be Allah who sent thee to me, for I was
distraught and had none to deliver me!" "Well hast thou done, O
woman!" answered the husband. "Thy reward is with Allah the
Almighty, and may He abundantly requite thy good deed!" Then he
went to the trap door and called to the page, saying, "Come forth
and fear not; no harm shall befal thee." So he came out,
trembling for fear, and the husband said, "Be of good cheer: none
shall I hurt thee;" condoling with him on what had befallen him;
whilst the page called down blessings on his head. Then they both
went forth, nor was that Cornuto nor was the page aware of that
which the woman had contrived. "This, then, O King," said the
Wazir, "is one of the tricks of women; so beware lest thou rely
upon their I words." The King was persuaded and turned from
putting his son to death; but, on the third day, the favourite
came in to him I and, kissing the ground before him, cried, "O
King, do me justice on thy son and be not turned from thy purpose
by thy Ministers' prate, for there is no good in wicked Wazirs,
and be not as the King of Baghdad, who relied on the word of a
certain wicked counsellor of his." Quoth he, "And how was that?"
Quoth she, "There hath been told me, O auspicious and
well-advised King, a tale of

The Kings Son and the Ogress.[FN#171]

A certain King had a son, whom he loved and favoured with
exceeding favour, over all his other children; and this son said
to him one day, "O my father, I have a mind to fare a-coursing
and a-hunting." So the King bade furnish him and commanded one of
his Wazirs to bear him company and do all the service he needed
during his trip. The Minister accordingly took everything that
was necessary for the journey and they set out with a retinue of
eunuchs and officers and pages, and rode on, sporting as they
went, till they came to a green and well-grassed champaign
abounding in pasture and water and game. Here the Prince turned
to the Minister and told him that the place pleased him and he
purposed to halt there. So they set down in that site and they
loosed the falcons and lynxes and dogs and caught great plenty of
game, whereat they rejoiced and abode there some days, in all
joyance of life and its delight. Then the King's son gave the
signal for departure; but, as they went along, a beautiful
gazelle, as if the sun rose shining from between her horns, that
had strayed from her mate, sprang up before the Prince, whereupon
his soul longed to make prize of her and he coveted her. So he
said to the Wazir, "I have a mind to follow that gazelle;" and
the Minister replied, "Do what seemeth good to thee." Thereupon
the Prince rode single-handed after the gazelle, till he lost
sight of his companions, and chased her all that day till dusk,
when she took refuge in a bit of rocky ground[FN#172] and
darkness closed in upon him. Then he would have turned back, but
knew not the way; whereat he was sore concerned and said, "There
is no Majesty and there is no Might save in Allah, the Glorious,
the Great!" He sat his mare all night till morning dawned, in
quest of relief, but found none; and, when the day appeared, he
fared on at hazard fearful, famished, thirsty, and knowing not
whither to wend till it was noon and the sun beat down upon him
with burning heat. By that time he came in sight of a great city,
with massive base and lofty bulwarks; but it was ruined and
desolate, nor was there any live thing therein save owl and
raven. As he stood among the buildings, marvelling at their
ordinance, lo! his eyes fell on a damsel, young, beautiful and
lovely, sitting under one of the city walls wailing and weeping
copious tears. So he drew nigh to her and asked, "Who art thou
and who brought thee hither?" She answered, "I am called Bint
al-Tamimah, daughter of Al-Tiyakh, King of the Gray Country. I
went out one day to obey a call of nature,[FN#173] when an Ifrit
of the Jinn snatched me up and soared with me between heaven and
earth; but as he flew there fell on him a shooting-star in the
form of a flame of fire and burned him, and I dropped here, where
these three days I have hungered and thirsted; but when I saw
thee I longed for life." --And Shahrazad perceived the dawn of
day and ceased to say her permitted say.

When it was the Five Hundred and Eighty-second Night,

She said, It hath reached me, O auspicious King, that the Prince
when addressed by the daughter of King Al-Tiyakh who said to him,
"When I saw thee I longed for life," was smitten with ruth and
grief for her and took her up on his courser's crupper, saying,
"Be of good cheer and keep thine eyes cool and clear; for, if
Allah (extolled and exalted be He!) restore me to my people and
family, I will send thee back to thine own folk." Then he rode
on, praying for deliverance, and presently the damsel said to
him, "O King's son, set me down, that I may do an occasion under
this wall." So he drew bridle and she alighted. He waited for her
a long while as she hid herself behind the wall; and she came
forth, with the foulest of favours; which when he saw, his hair
stood on end and he quaked for fear of her and he turned deadly
pale. Then she sprang up on his steed, behind him, wearing the
most loathly of aspects, and presently she said to him, "O King's
son, what ails thee that I see thee troubled and thy favour
changed?" "I have bethought me of somewhat that troubles me."
"Seek aid against it of thy father's troops and his braves." "He
whom I fear careth naught for troops, neither can braves affright
him." "Aid thyself against him with thy father's monies and
treasures." "He whom I fear will not be satisfied with wealth."
"Ye hold that ye have in Heaven a God who seeth and is not seen
and is Omnipotent and Omniscient." "Yes, we have none but Him."
"Then pray thou to Him; haply He will deliver thee from me thine
enemy!" So the King's son raised his eyes to heaven and began to
pray with his whole heart, saying, "O my God, I implore Thy
succour against that which troubleth me." Then he pointed to her
with his hand, and she fell to the ground, burnt black as
charcoal. Therewith he thanked Allah and praised Him and ceased
not to fare forwards; and the Almighty (extolled and exalted be
He!) of His grace made the way easy to him and guided him into
the right road, so that he reached his own land and came upon his
father's capital, after he had despaired of life. Now all this
befel by the contrivance of the Wazir, who travelled with him, to
the end that he might cause him to perish on the way; but
Almighty Allah succoured him. "And this" (said the damsel) "have
I told thee, O King, that thou mayst know that wicked Wazirs deal
not honestly by nor counsel with sincere intent their Kings;
wherefore be thou wise and ware of them in this matter." The King
gave ear to her speech and bade put his son to death; but the
third Wazir came in and said to his brother Ministers, "I will
warrant you from the King's mischief this day" and, going in to
him, kissed the ground between his hands and said, "O King, I am
thy true counsellor and solicitous for thee and for thine estate,
and indeed I rede thee the best of rede; it is that thou hasten
not to slay thy son, the coolth of thine eyes and the fruit of
thy vitals. Haply his sin is but a slight slip, which this damsel
hath made great to thee; and indeed I have heard tell that the
people of two villages once destroyed one another, because of a
drop of honey." Asked the King, "How was that?"; and the Wazir
answered, saying, "Know, O King, that I have heard this story
anent

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