The Book of the Thousand Nights and a Night, Volume 1

R >> Richard F. Burton >> The Book of the Thousand Nights and a Night, Volume 1

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Tale of the Jewish Doctor.

Right marvellous was a matter which came to pass to me in my
youth. I lived in Damascus of Syria studying my art and, one day,
as I was sitting at home behold, there came to me a Mameluke from
the household of the Sahib and said to me, "Speak with my lord!"
So I followed him to the Viceroy's house and, entering the great
hall, saw at its head a couch of cedar plated with gold whereon
lay a sickly youth beautiful withal; fairer than he one could not
see. I sat down by his head and prayed to Heaven for a cure; and
he made me a sign with his eyes, so I said to him, "O my lord!
favour me with thy hand, and safety be with thee!"[FN#572] Then
he put forth his left hand and I marvelled thereat and said, "By
Allah, strange that this handsome youth, the son of a great
house, should so lack good manners. This can be nothing but pride
and conceit!" However I felt his pulse and wrote him a
prescription and continued to visit him for ten days, at the end
of which time he recovered and went to the Hammam,[FN#573]
whereupon the Viceroy gave me a handsome dress of honour and
appointed me superintendent of the hospital which is in
Damascus.[FN#574] I accompanied him to the baths, the whole of
which they had kept private for his accommodation; and the
servants came in with him and took off his clothes within the
bath, and when he was stripped I saw that his right hand had been
newly cut off, and this was the cause of his weakliness At this I
was amazed and grieved for him: then, looking at his body, I saw
on it the scars of scourge stripes whereto he had applied
unguents. I was troubled at the sight and my concern appeared in
my face. The young man looked at me and, comprehending the
matter, said, "O Physician of the age, marvel not at my case; I
will tell thee my story as soon as we quit the baths." Then we
washed and, returning to his house, ate somewhat of food and took
rest awhile; after which he asked me, "What sayest thou to
solacing thee by inspecting the supper hall?"; and I answered "So
let it be." Thereupon he ordered the slaves to carry out the
carpets and cushions required and roast a lamb and bring us some
fruit. They did his bidding and we ate together, he using the
left hand for the purpose. After a while I said to him, "Now tell
me thy tale." "O Physician of the age," replied he, "hear what
befell me. Know that I am of the sons of Mosul, where my
grandfather died leaving nine children of whom my father was the
eldest. All grew up and took to them wives, but none of them was
blessed with offspring except my father, to whom Providence
vouchsafed me. So I grew up amongst my uncles who rejoiced in me
with exceeding joy, till I came to man's estate. One day which
happened to be a Friday, I went to the Cathedral mosque of Mosul
with my father and my uncles, and we prayed the congregational
prayers, after which the folk went forth, except my father and
uncles, who sat talking of wondrous things in foreign parts and
the marvellous sights of strange cities. At last they mentioned
Egypt, and one of my uncles said, "Travellers tell us that there
is not on earth's face aught fairer than Cairo and her Nile;" and
these words made me long to see Cairo. Quoth my father, "Whoso
hath not seen Cairo hath not seen the world. Her dust is golden
and her Nile a miracle holden; and her women are as Houris fair;
puppets, beautiful pictures; her houses are palaces rare; her
water is sweet and light[FN#575] and her mud a commodity and a
medicine beyond compare, even as said the poet in this his
poetry:--

The Nile[FN#576] flood this day is the gain you own; * You alone
in such gain and bounties wone:
The Nile is my tear flood of severance, * And here none is
forlorn but I alone.

Moreover temperate is her air, and with fragrance blent, Which
surpasseth aloes wood in scent; and how should it be otherwise,
she being the Mother of the World? And Allah favour him who wrote
these lines:--

An I quit Cairo and her pleasaunces, * Where can I wend to find
so gladsome ways?
Shall I desert that site, whose grateful scents * Joy every soul
and call for loudest praise?
Where every palace, as another Eden, * Carpets and cushions
richly wrought displays;
A city wooing sight and sprite to glee, * Where Saint meets
Sinner and each 'joys his craze;
Where friend meets friend, by Providence united * In greeny
garden and in palmy maze:
People of Cairo, and by Allah's doom * I fare, with you in
thoughts I wone always!
Whisper not Cairo in the ear of Zephyr, * Lest for her like of
garden scents he reave her,[FN#577]

And if your eyes saw her earth, and the adornment thereof with
bloom, and the purfling of it with all manner blossoms, and the
islands of the Nile and how much is therein of wide spread and
goodly prospect, and if you bent your sight upon the Abyssinian
Pond,[FN#578] your glance would not revert from the scene quit of
wonder; for nowhere would you behold the fellow of that lovely
view; and, indeed, the two arms of the Nile embrace most
luxuriant verdure,[FN#579] as the white of the eye encompasseth
its black or like filigreed silver surrounding chrysolites. And
divinely gifted was the poet who there anent said these
couplets:--

By th' Abyssinian Pond, O day divine!* In morning twilight and
in sunny shine:
The water prisoned in its verdurous walls, * Like sabre flashes
before shrinking eyne:
And in The Garden sat we while it drains * Slow draught, with
purfled sides dyed finest fine:
The stream is rippled by the hands of clouds; * We too,
a-rippling, on our rugs recline,
Passing pure wine, and whoso leaves us there * Shall ne'er arise
from fall his woes design:
Draining long draughts from large and brimming bowls, *
Administ'ring thirst's only medicine--wine.

And what is there to compare with the Rasad, the Observatory, and
its charms whereof every viewer as he approacheth saith, 'Verily
this spot is specialised with all manner of excellence!' And if
thou speak of the Night of Nile full,[FN#580] give the rainbow
and distribute it![FN#581] And if thou behold The Garden at
eventide, with the cool shades sloping far and wide, a marvel
thou wouldst see and wouldst incline to Egypt in ecstasy. And
wert thou by Cairo's river side,[FN#582] when the sun is sinking
and the stream dons mail coat and habergeon[FN#583] over its
other vestments, thou wouldst be quickened to new life by its
gentle zephyrs and by its all sufficient shade." So spake he and
the rest fell to describing Egypt and her Nile. As I heard their
accounts, my thoughts dwelt upon the subject and when, after
talking their fill, all arose and went their ways, I lay down to
sleep that night, but sleep came not because of my violent
longing for Egypt; and neither meat pleased me nor drink. After a
few days my uncles equipped themselves for a trade journey to
Egypt; and I wept before my father till he made ready for me
fitting merchandise, and he consented to my going with them,
saying however, "Let him not enter Cairo, but leave him to sell
his wares at Damascus." So I took leave of my father and we fared
forth from Mosul and gave not over travelling till we reached
Aleppo[FN#584] where we halted certain days. Then we marched
onwards till we made Damascus and we found her a city as though
she were a Paradise, abounding in trees and streams and birds and
fruits of all kinds. We alighted at one of the Khans, where my
uncles tarried awhile selling and buying; and they bought and
sold also on my account, each dirham turning a profit of five on
prime cost, which pleased me mightily. After this they left me
alone and set their faces Egyptwards; whilst I abode at Damascus,
where I had hired from a jeweller, for two dinars a month, a
mansion[FN#585] whose beauties would beggar the tongue. Here I
remained, eating and drinking and spending what monies I had in
hand till, one day, as I was sitting at the door of my house be
hold, there came up a young lady clad in costliest raiment never
saw my eyes richer. I winked[FN#5886 at her and she stepped
inside without hesitation and stood within. I entered with her
and shut the door upon myself and her; whereupon she raised her
face veil and threw off her mantilla, when I found her like a
pictured moon of rare and marvellous loveliness; and love of her
gat hold of my heart. So I rose and brought a tray of the most
delicate eatables and fruits and whatso befitted the occasion,
and we ate and played and after that we drank till the wine
turned our heads. Then I lay with her the sweetest of nights and
in the morning I offered her ten gold pieces; when her face
lowered and her eye brows wrinkled and shaking with wrath she
cried, "Fie upon thee, O my sweet companion! dost thou deem that
I covet thy money?" Then she took out from the bosom of her
shift[FN#587] fifteen dinars and, laying them before me, said,
"By Allah! unless thou take them I will never come back to thee."
So I accepted them and she said to me, "O my beloved! expect me
again in three days' time, when I will be with thee between
sunset and supper tide; and do thou prepare for us with these
dinars the same entertainment as yesternight." So saying, she
took leave of me and went away and all my senses went with her.
On the third day she came again, clad in stuff weft with gold
wire, and wearing raiment and ornaments finer than before. I had
prepared the place for her ere she arrived and the repast was
ready; so we ate and drank and lay together, as we had done, till
the morning, when she gave me other fifteen gold pieces and
promised to come again after three days. Accordingly, I made
ready for her and, at the appointed time, she presented herself
more richly dressed than on the first and second occasions, and
said to me, "O my lord, am I not beautiful?" "Yea, by Allah thou
art!" answered I, and she went on, "Wilt thou allow me to bring
with me a young lady fairer than I, and younger in years, that
she may play with us and thou and she may laugh and make merry
and rejoice her heart, for she hath been very sad this long time
past, and hath asked me to take her out and let her spend the
night abroad with me?" "Yea, by Allah!" I replied; and we drank
till the wine turned our heads and slept till the morning, when
she gave me other fifteen dinars, saying, "Add something to thy
usual provision on account of the young lady who will come with
me." Then she went away, and on the fourth day I made ready the
house as usual, and soon after sunset behold, she came,
accompanied by another damsel carefully wrapped in her mantilla.
They entered and sat down; and when I saw them I repeated these
verses:--

"How dear is our day and how lucky our lot, * When the cynic's
away with his tongue malign!
When love and delight and the swimming of head * Send
cleverness trotting, the best boon of wine.
When the full moon shines from the cloudy veil, * And the
branchlet sways in her greens that shine:
When the red rose mantles in freshest cheek, * And
Narcissus[FN#588] opeth his love sick eyne:
When pleasure with those I love is so sweet, * When friendship
with those I love is complete!"

I rejoiced to see them, and lighted the candles after receiving
them with gladness and delight. They doffed their heavy outer
dresses and the new damsel uncovered her face when I saw that she
was like the moon at its full never beheld I aught more
beautiful. Then I rose and set meat and drink before them, and we
ate and drank; and I kept giving mouthfuls to the new comer,
crowning her cup and drinking with her till the first damsel,
waxing inwardly jealous, asked me, "By Allah, is she not more
delicious than I?"; whereto I answered, "Ay, by the Lord!" "It is
my wish that thou lie with her this night; for I am thy mistress
but she is our visitor. Upon my head be it, and my eyes." Then
she rose and spread the carpets for our bed[FN#589] and I took
the young lady and lay with her that night till morning, when I
awoke and found myself wet, as I thought, with sweat. I sat up
and tried to arouse the damsel; but when I shook her by the
shoulders my hand became crimson with blood and her head rolled
off the pillow. Thereupon my senses fled and I cried aloud,
saying, "O All powerful Protector, grant me Thy protection!" Then
finding her neck had been severed, I sprung up and the world
waxed black before my eyes, and I looked for the lady, my former
love, but could not find her. So I knew that it was she who had
murdered the damsel in her jealousy,[FN#590] and said, "There is
no Majesty and there is no Might save in Allah, the Glorious, the
Great! What is to be done now?" I considered awhile then, doffing
my clothes, dug a hole in the middle of the court yard, wherein I
laid the murdered girl with her jewellery and golden ornaments;
and, throwing back the earth on her, replaced the slabs of the
marble[FN#591] pavement. After this I made the Ghusl or total
ablution,[FN#592] and put on pure clothes; then, taking what
money I had left, locked up the house and summoned courage and
went to its owner to whom I paid a year's rent, saying, "I am
about to join my uncles in Cairo." Presently I set out and,
journeying to Egypt, foregathered with my uncles who rejoiced in
me, and I found that they had made an end of selling their
merchandise. They asked me, "What is the cause of thy coming?";
and I answered "I longed for a sight of you;" but did not let
them know that I had any money with me. I abode with them a year,
enjoying the pleasures of Cairo and her Nile,[FN#593] and
squandering the rest of my money in feasting and carousing till
the time drew near for the departure of my uncles, when I fled
from them and hid myself. They made enquiries and sought for me,
but hearing no tidings they said, "He will have gone back to
Damascus." When they departed I came forth from my hiding place
and abode in Cairo three years, until naught remained of my
money. Now every year I used to send the rent of the Damascus
house to its owner, until at last I had nothing left but enough
to pay him for one year's rent and my breast was straitened. So I
travelled to Damascus and alighted at the house whose owner, the
jeweller, was glad to see me and I found everything locked up as
I had left it. I opened the closets and took out my clothes and
necessaries and came upon, beneath the carpet bed whereon I had
lain that night with the girl who had been beheaded, a golden
necklace set with ten gems of passing beauty. I took it up and,
cleansing it of the blood, sat gazing upon it and wept awhile.
Then I abode in the house two days and on the third I entered the
Hammam and changed my clothes. I had no money by me now; so Satan
whispered temptation to me that the Decree of Destiny be carried
out. Next day I took the jewelled necklace to the bazaar and
handed it to a broker who made me sit down in the shop of the
jeweller, my landlord, and bade me have patience till the market
was full,[FN#594] when he carried off the ornament and proclaimed
it for sale, privily and without my knowledge. The necklet was
priced as worth two thousand dinars, but the broker returned to
me and said, "This collar is of copper, a mere counterfeit after
the fashion of the Franks[FN#595] and a thousand dirhams have
been bidden for it." "Yes," I answered, "I knew it to be copper,
as we had it made for a certain person that we might mock her:
now my wife hath inherited it and we wish to sell it; so go and
take over the thousand dirhams."--And Shahrazad perceived the
dawn of day and ceased to say her permitted say.

When it was the Twenty-ninth Night,

She said, It hath reached me, O auspicious King, that the
beautiful youth said to the broker, "Take over the thousand
dirhams;" and when the broker heard this, he knew that the case
was suspicious. So he carried the collar to the Syndic of the
bazaar, and the Syndic took it to the Governor who was also
prefect of police, and said to him falsely enough, "This necklet
was stolen from my house, and we have found the thief in traders'
dress." So before I was aware of it the watch got round me and,
making me their prisoner, carried me before the Governor who
questioned me of the collar. I told him the tale I had told to
the broker; but he laughed and said, "These words are not true."
Then, before I knew what was doing, the guard stripped off my
clothes and came down with palm rods upon my ribs, till for the
smart of the stick I confessed, "It was I who stole it;" saying
to myself, "'Tis better for thee to say, I stole it, than to let
them know that its owner was murdered in thy house, for then
would they slay thee to avenge her." So they wrote down that I
had stolen it and they cut off my hand and scalded the stump in
oil,[FN#596] when I swooned away for pain; but they gave me wine
to drink and I recovered and, taking up my hand, was going to my
fine house, when my landlord said to me, "Inasmuch, O my son, as
this hath befallen thee, thou must leave my house and look out
for another lodging for thee, since thou art convicted of theft.
Thou art a handsome youth, but who will pity thee after this?" "O
my master" said I, "bear with me but two days or three, till I
find me another place." He answered, "So be it." and went away
and left me. I returned to the house where I sat weeping and
saying, How shall I go back to my own people with my hand lopped
off and they know not that I am innocent? Perchance even after
this Allah may order some matter for me." And I wept with
exceeding weeping, grief beset me and I remained in sore trouble
for two days; but on the third day my landlord came suddenly in
to me, and with him some of the guard and the Syndic of the
bazaar, who had falsely charged me with stealing the necklet. I
went up to them and asked, "What is the matter?" however, they
pinioned me with out further parley and threw a chain about my
neck, saying, "The necklet which was with thee hath proved to be
the property of the Wazir of Damascus who is also her Viceroy;"
and they added, "It was missing from his house three years ago at
the same time as his younger daughter." When I heard these words,
my heart sank within me and I said to myself, "Thy life is gone
beyond a doubt! By Allah, needs must I tell the Chief my story;
and, if he will, let him kill me, and if he please, let him
pardon me." So they carried me to the Wazir's house and made me
stand between his hands. When he saw me, he glanced at me out of
the corner of his eye and said to those present, "Why did ye lop
off his hand? This man is unfortunate, and there is no fault in
him; indeed ye have wronged him in cutting off his hand." When I
heard this, I took heart and, my soul presaging good, I said to
him, "By Allah, O my lord, I am no thief; but they calumniated me
with a vile calumny, and they scourged me midmost the market,
bidding me confess till, for the pain of the rods, I lied against
myself and confessed the theft, albeit I am altogether innocent
of it." "Fear not," quoth the Viceroy, "no harm shall come to
thee." Then he ordered the Syndic of the bazaar to be imprisoned
and said to him, "Give this man the blood money for his hand;
and, if thou delay I will hang thee and seize all thy property."
Moreover he called to his guards who took him and dragged him
away, leaving me with the Chief. Then they loosed by his command
the chain from my neck and unbound my arms; and he looked at me,
and said, "O my son, be true with me, and tell me how this
necklace came to thee." And he repeated these verses:--

"Truth best befits thee, albeit truth * Shall bring thee to burn
on the threatened fire."

"By Allah, O my lord," answered I, "I will tell thee nothing but
the truth." Then I related to him all that had passed between me
and the first lady, and how she had brought me the second and had
slain her out of jealousy, and I detailed for him the tale to its
full. When he heard my story, he shook his head and struck his
right hand upon the left,[FN#597] and putting his kerchief over
his face wept awhile and then repeated:--

"I see the woes of the world abound, * And worldings sick with
spleen and teen;
There's One who the meeting of two shall part, * And who part not
are few and far between!"

Then he turned to me and said, "Know, O my son, that the elder
damsel who first came to thee was my daughter whom I used to keep
closely guarded. When she grew up, I sent her to Cairo and
married her to her cousin, my brother's son. After a while he
died and she came back: but she had learnt wantonness and
ungraciousness from the people of Cairo;[FN#598] so she visited
thee four times and at last brought her younger sister. Now they
were sisters-german and much attached to each other; and, when
that adventure happened to the elder, she disclosed her secret to
her sister who desired to go out with her. So she asked thy leave
and carried her to thee; after which she returned alone and,
finding her weeping, I questioned her of her sister, but she
said, 'I know nothing of her.' However, she presently told her
mother privily of what had happened and how she had cut off her
sister's head and her mother told me. Then she ceased not to weep
and say, 'By Allah! I shall cry for her till I die.' Nor did she
give over mourning till her heart broke and she died; and things
fell out after that fashion. See then, O my son, what hath come
to pass; and now I desire thee not to thwart me in what I am
about to offer thee, and it is that I purpose to marry thee to my
youngest daughter; for she is a virgin and born of another
mother;[FN#599] and I will take no dower of thee but, on the
contrary, will appoint thee an allowance, and thou shalt abide
with me in my house in the stead of my son." "So be it," I
answered, "and how could I hope for such good fortune?" Then he
sent at once for the Kazi and witnesses, and let write my
marriage contract with his daughter and I went in to her.
Moreover, he got me from the Syndic of the bazaar a large sum of
money and I became in high favour with him. During this year news
came to me that my father was dead and the Wazir despatched a
courier, with letters bearing the royal sign manual, to fetch me
the money which my father had left behind him, and now I am
living in all the solace of life. Such was the manner of the
cutting off my right hand." I marvelled at his story (continued
the Jew), and I abode with him three days after which he gave me
much wealth, and I set out and travelled Eastward till I reached
this your city and the sojourn suited me right well; so I took up
my abode here and there befell me what thou knowest with the
Hunchback. There upon the King of China shook his head[FN#600]
and said, "This story of thine is not stranger and more wondrous
and marvellous and delectable than the tale of the Hunchback; and
so needs must I hang the whole number of you. However there yet
remains the Tailor who is the head of all the offence;" and he
added, "O Tailor, if thou canst tell me any thing more wonderful
than the story of the Hunchback, I will pardon you all your
offences." Thereupon the man came forward and began to tell the

Tale of the Tailor.

Know, O King of the age, that most marvellous was that which
befell me but yesterday, before I foregathered with the Hunch
back. It so chanced that in the early day I was at the marriage
feast of one of my companions, who had gotten together in his
house some twenty of the handicraftsmen of this city, amongst
them tailors and silk spinners and carpenters and others of the
same kidney. As soon as the sun had risen, they set food[FN#601]
before us that we might eat when behold, the master of the house
entered, and with him a foreign youth and a well favoured of the
people of Baghdad, wearing clothes as handsome as handsome could
be; and he was of right comely presence save that he was lame of
one leg. He came and saluted us and we stood up to receive him;
but when he was about to sit down he espied amongst us a certain
man which was a Barber; whereupon he refused to be seated and
would have gone away. But we stopped him and our host also stayed
him, making oath that he should not leave us and asked him, "What
is the reason of thy coming in and going out again at once?";
whereto he answered, "By Allah, O my lord, do not hinder me; for
the cause of my turning back is yon Barber of bad omen,[FN#602]
yon black o'face, yon ne'er do well!" When the housemaster heard
these words he marvelled with extreme marvel and said, "How
cometh this young man, who haileth from Baghdad, to be so
troubled and perplexed about this Barber?" Then we looked at the
stranger and said, "Explain the cause of thine anger against the
Barber." "O fair company," quoth the youth, "there befell me a
strange adventure with this Barber in Baghdad (which is my native
city); he was the cause of the breaking of my leg and of my
lameness, and I have sworn never to sit in the same place with
him, nor even tarry in any town where he happens to abide; and I
have bidden adieu to Baghdad and travelled far from it and came
to stay in this your city; yet I have hardly passed one night
before I meet him again. But not another day shall go by ere I
fare forth from here." Said we to him, "Allah upon thee, tell us
the tale;" and the youth replied (the Barber changing colour from
brown to yellow as he spoke): Know, O fair company, that my
father was one of the chief merchants of Baghdad, and Almighty
Allah had blessed him with no son but myself. When I grew up and
reached man's estate, my father was received into the mercy of
Allah (whose Name be exalted!) and left me money and eunuchs,
servants and slaves; and I used to dress well and diet well. Now
Allah had made me a hater of women kind and one day, as I was
walking along a street in Baghdad, a party of females met me face
to face in the footway; so I fled from them and, entering an
alley which was no thoroughfare, sat down upon a stone bench at
its other end. I had not sat there long before the latticed
window of one of the houses opposite was thrown open, and there
appeared at it a young lady, as she were the full moon at its
fullest; never in my life saw I her like; and she began to water
some flowers on the window sill.[FN#603] She turned right and
left and, seeing me watching her, shut the window and went away.
Thereupon fire was suddenly enkindled in my heart; my mind was
possessed with her and my woman hate turned to woman love. I
continued sitting there, lost to the world, till sunset when lo!
the Kazi of the city came riding by with his slaves before him
and his eunuchs behind him, and dismounting entered the house in
which the damsel had appeared. By this I knew that he was her
father; so I went home sorrowful and cast myself upon my carpet
bed in grief. Then my handmaids flocked in and sat about me,
unknowing what ailed me; but I addressed no speech to them, and
they wept and wailed over me. Presently in came an old woman who
looked at me and saw with a glance what was the matter with me:
so she by my head spoke me fair, saying, "O my son, tell me all
about it and I will be the means of thy union with her."[FN#604]
So I related to her what had happened and she answered, "O my
son, this one is the daughter of the Kazi of Baghdad who keepeth
her in the closest seclusion; and the window where thou sawest
her is her floor, whilst her father occupies the large saloon in
the lower story. She is often there alone and I am wont to visit
at the house; so thou shalt not win to her save through me. Now
set thy wits to work and be of good cheer." With these words she
went away and I took heart at what she said and my people
rejoiced that day, seeing me rise in the morning safe and sound.
By and by the old woman returned looking chopfallen,[FN#605] and
said, "O my son, do not ask me how I fared with her! When I told
her that, she cried at me, 'If thou hold not thy peace, O hag of
ill omen, and leave not such talk, I will entreat thee as thou
deservest and do thee die by the foulest of deaths.' But needs
must I have at her a second time."[FN#606] When I heard this it
added ailment to my ailment and the neighbours visited me and
judged that I was not long for this world; but after some days,
the old woman came to me and, putting her mouth close to my ear,
whispered, "O my son; I claim from thee the gift of good news."
With this my soul returned to me and I said, "Whatever thou wilt
shall be thine." Thereupon she began, "Yesterday I went to the
young lady who, seeing me broken in spirit and shedding tears
from reddened eyes, asked me, 'O naunty[FN#607] mine, what ails
thee, that I see thy breast so straitened?'; and I answered her,
weeping bitterly, 'O my lady, I am just come from the house of a
youth who loves thee and who is about to die for sake of thee!'
Quoth she (and her heart was softened), 'And who is this youth of
whom thou speakest?'; and quoth I, 'He is to me as a son and the
fruit of my vitals. He saw thee, some days ago, at the window
watering thy flowers and espying thy face and wrists he fell in
love at first sight. I let him know what happened to me the last
time I was with thee, whereupon his ailment increased, he took to
the pillow and he is naught now but a dead man, and no doubt what
ever of it.' At this she turned pale and asked, 'All this for my
sake?'; and I answered, 'Ay, by Allah![FN#608] what wouldst thou
have me do?' Said she, 'Go back to him and greet him for me and
tell him that I am twice more heartsick than he is. And on
Friday, before the hour of public prayer, bid him here to the
house, and I will come down and open the door for him. Then I
will carry him up to my chamber and foregather with him for a
while, and let him depart before my father return from the
Mosque.'" When I heard the old woman's words, all my sickness
suddenly fell from me, my anguish ceased and my heart was
comforted; I took off what clothes were on me and gave them to
her and, as she turned to go, she said, "Keep a good heart!" "I
have not a jot of sorrow left." I replied. My household and
intimates rejoiced in my recovery and I abode thus till Friday,
when behold, the old woman came in and asked me how I did, to
which I answered that I was well and in good case. Then I donned
my clothes and perfumed myself and sat down to await the
congregation going in to prayers, that I might betake myself to
her. But the old woman said to me, "Thou hast time and to spare:
so thou wouldst do well to go to the Hammam and have thy hair
shaven off (especially after thy ailment), so as not to show
traces of sickness." "This were the best way," answered I, "I
have just now bathed in hot water, but I will have my head
shaved." Then I said to my page, "Go to the bazaar and bring me a
barber, a discreet fellow and one not inclined to meddling or
impertinent curiosity or likely to split my head with his
excessive talk."[FN#609] The boy went out at once and brought
back with him this wretched old man, this Shaykh of ill omen.
When he came in he saluted me and I returned his salutation; then
quoth he, "Of a truth I see thee thin of body;" and quoth I, "I
have been ailing." He continued, "Allah drive far away from thee
thy woe and thy sorrow and thy trouble and thy distress." "Allah
grant thy prayer!" said I. He pursued, "All gladness to thee, O
my master, for indeed recovery is come to thee. Dost thou wish to
be polled or to be blooded? Indeed it was a tradition of Ibn
Abbas[FN#610] (Allah accept of him!) that the Apostle said,
'Whoso cutteth his hair on a Friday, the Lord shall avert from
him threescore and ten calamities;' and again is related of him
also that he said, 'Cupping on a Friday keepeth from loss of
sight and a host of diseases.'" "Leave this talk," I cried;
"come, shave me my head at once for I can't stand it." So he rose
and put forth his hand in most leisurely way and took out a
kerchief and unfolded it, and lo! it contained an
astrolabe[FN#611] with seven parallel plates mounted in silver.
Then he went to the middle of the court and raised head and
instrument towards the sun's rays and looked for a long while.
When this was over, he came back and said to me, "Know that there
have elapsed of this our day, which be Friday, and this Friday be
the tenth of the month Safar in the six hundred and fifty- third
year since the Hegira or Flight of the Apostle (on whom be the
bestest of blessings and peace!) and the seven thousand three
hundred and twentieth year of the era of Alexander, eight degrees
and six minutes. Furthermore the ascendant of this our day is,
according to the exactest science of computation, the planet
Mars; and it so happeneth that Mercury is in conjunction with
him, denoting an auspicious moment for hair cutting; and this
also maketh manifest to me that thou desires union with a certain
person and that your intercourse will not be propitious. But
after this there occurreth a sign respecting a matter which will
befall thee and whereof I will not speak." "O thou," cried I, "by
Allah, thou weariest me and scatterest my wits and thy forecast
is other than good; I sent for thee to poll my head and naught
else: so up and shave me and prolong not thy speech." "By Allah,"
replied he, "if thou but knew what is about to befall thee, thou
wouldst do nothing this day, and I counsel thee to act as I tell
thee by computation of the constellations." "By Allah," said I,
"never did I see a barber who excelled in judicial astrology save
thyself: but I think and I know that thou art most prodigal of
frivolous talk. I sent for thee only to shave my head, but thou
comest and pesterest me with this sorry prattle." "What more
wouldst thou have?" replied he. "Allah hath bounteously bestowed
on thee a Barber who is an astrologer, one learned in alchemy and
white magic;[FN#612] syntax, grammar, and lexicology; the arts of
logic, rhetoric and elocution; mathematics, arithmetic and
algebra; astronomy, astromancy and geometry; theology, the
Traditions of the Apostle and the Commentaries on the Koran.
Furthermore, I have read books galore and digested them and have
had experience of affairs and comprehended them. In short I have
learned the theorick and the practick of all the arts and
sciences; I know everything of them by rote and I am a past
master in tota re scibili. Thy father loved me for my lack of
officiousness, argal, to serve thee is a religious duty incumbent
on me. I am no busy body as thou seemest to suppose, and on this
account I am known as The Silent Man, also, The Modest Man.
Wherefore it behoveth thee to render thanks to Allah Almighty and
not cross me, for I am a true counsellor to thee and benevolently
minded towards thee. Would that I were in thy service a whole
year that thou mightest do me justice; and I would ask thee no
wage for all this." When I heard his flow of words, I said to
him, "Doubtless thou wilt be my death this day!"--And Shahrazad
perceived the dawn of day and ceased saying her permitted say.

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