The Book of the Thousand Nights and a Night, Volume 1

R >> Richard F. Burton >> The Book of the Thousand Nights and a Night, Volume 1

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"Long have I wept o'er severance ban and bane, * Long from mine
eyelids tear-rills rail and rain:
And vowed I if Time re-union bring * My tongue from name of
"Severance" I'll restrain:
Joy hath o'ercome me to this stress that I * From joy's revulsion
to shed tears am fain:
Ye are so trained to tears, O eyne of me! * You weep with
pleasure as you weep with pain." [FN#482]

When he had ended his verse his mother came in and threw herself
upon him and began reciting:--

"When we met we complained, * Our hearts were sore wrung:
But plaint is not pleasant * Fro' messenger's tongue."

Then she wept and related to him what had befallen her since his
departure, and he told her what he had suffered, and they thanked
Allah Almighty for their reunion. Two days after his arrival the
Wazir Shams al-din went in to the Sultan and, kissing the ground
between his hands, greeted him with the greeting due to Kings.
The Sultan rejoiced at his return and his face brightened and,
placing him hard by his side, [FN#483] asked him to relate all he
had seen in his wayfaring and whatso had betided him in his going
and coming. So the Wazir told him all that had passed from first
to last and the Sultan said, "Thanks be to Allah for thy victory
[FN#484] and the winning of thy wish and thy safe return to thy
children and thy people! And now I needs must see the son of thy
brother, Hasan of Bassorah, so bring him to the audience-hall to-
morrow." Shams al-Din replied, "Thy slave shall stand in thy
presence to-morrow, Inshallah, if it be God's will." Then he
saluted him and, returning to his own house, informed his nephew
of the Sultan's desire to see him, whereto replied Hasan, whilome
the Bassorite, "The slave is obedient to the orders of his lord."
And the result was that next day he accompanied his uncle, Shams
al-Din, to the Divan; and, after saluting the Sultan and doing
him reverence in most ceremonious obeisance and with most courtly
obsequiousness, he began improvising these verses:--

"The first in rank to kiss the ground shall deign * Before you,
and all ends and aims attain:
You are Honour's fount; and all that hope of you, * Shall gain
more honour than Hope hoped to gain."

The Sultan smiled and signed to him to sit down. So he took a
seat close to his uncle, Shams al-Din, and the King asked him his
name. Quoth Badr al-Din Hasan, "The meanest of thy slaves is
known as Hasan the Bassorite, who is instant in prayer for thee
day and night." The Sultan was pleased at his words and, being
minded to test his learning and prove his good breeding, asked
him, "Dost thou remember any verses in praise of the mole on the
cheek?" He answered, "I do," and began reciting:--

"When I think of my love and our parting-smart, * My groans go
forth and my tears upstart:
He's a mole that reminds me in colour and charms * O' the black
o' the eye and the grain [FN#485] of the heart."

The King admired and praised the two couplets and said to him,
"Quote something else; Allah bless thy sire and may thy tongue
never tire!" So he began:--

"That cheek-mole's spot they evened with a grain * Of musk, nor
did they here the simile strain:
Nay, marvel at the face comprising all * Beauty, nor falling
short by single grain."

The King shook with pleasure [FN#486] and said to him, "Say more:
Allah bless thy days!" So he began:--

"O you whose mole on cheek enthroned recalls * A dot of musk
upon a stone of ruby,
Grant me your favours! Be not stone at heart! * Core of my heart
whose only sustenance you be!"

Quoth the King, "Fair comparison, O Hasan! [FN#487] thou hast
spoken excellently well and hast proved thyself accomplished in
every accomplishment! Now explain to me how many meanings be
there in the Arabic language [FN#488] for the word Khal or mole."
He replied, "Allah keep the King! Seven and fifty and some by
tradition say fifty." Said the Sultan, "Thou sayest sooth,"
presently adding, "Hast thou knowledge as to the points of
excellence in beauty?" "Yes," answered Badr al-Din Hasan,
"Beauty consisteth in brightness of face, clearness of
complexion, shapeliness of nose, gentleness of eyes, sweetness of
mouth, cleverness of speech, slenderness of shape and seemliness
of all attributes. But the acme of beauty is in the hair and,
indeed, al-Shihab the Hijazi hath brought together all these
items in his doggrel verse of the metre Rajaz, [FN#489] and it is
this:

Say thou to skin "Be soft," to face "Be fair," * And gaze, nor
shall they blame howso thou stare:
Fine nose in Beauty's list is high esteemed; * Nor less an eye
full, bright and debonnair:
Eke did they well to laud the lovely lips * (Which e'en the sleep
of me will never spare);
A winning tongue, a stature tall and straight; [FN#490] * A
seemly union of gifts rarest rare:
But Beauty's acme in the hair one views it; * So hear my strain
and with some few excuse it!"

The Sultan was captivated by his converse and, regarding him as a
friend, asked, "What meaning is there in the saw 'Shurayh is
foxier than the fox'?" And he answered, "Know, O King (whom
Almighty Allah keep!) that the legist Shurayh [FN#491] was wont,
during the days of the plague, to make a visitation to Al-Najaf;
and, whenever he stood up to pray, there came a fox which would
plant himself facing him and which, by mimicking his movements,
distracted him from his devotions. Now when this became longsome
to him, one day he doffed his shirt and set it upon a cane and
shook out the sleeves; then placing his turband on the top and
girding its middle with a shawl, he stuck it up in the place
where he used to pray. Presently up trotted the fox according to
his custom and stood over against the figure, whereupon Shurayh
came behind him, and took him. Hence the sayer saith, 'Shurayh
foxier than the fox.'" When the Sultan heard Badr al-Din Hasan's
explanation he said to his uncle, Shams al-Din, "Truly this the
son of thy brother is perfect in courtly breeding and I do not
think that his like can be found in Cairo." At this Hasan arose
and kissed the ground before him and sat down again as a Mameluke
should sit before his master. When the Sultan had thus assured
himself of his courtly breeding and bearing and his knowledge of
the liberal arts and belles-lettres, he joyed with exceeding joy
and invested him with a splendid robe of honour and promoted him
to an office whereby he might better his condition. [FN#492]
Then Badr al-Din Hasan arose and, kissing the ground before the
King, wished him continuance of glory and asked leave to retire
with his uncle, the Wazir Shams al-Din. The Sultan gave him
leave and he issued forth and the two returned home, where food
was set before them and they ate what Allah had given them.
After finishing his meal Hasan repaired to the sitting-chamber of
his wife, the Lady of Beauty, and told her what had past between
him and the Sultan; whereupon quoth she, "He cannot fail to make
thee a cup-companion and give thee largess in excess and load
thee with favours and bounties; so shalt thou, by Allah's
blessing, dispread, like the greater light, the rays of thy
perfection wherever thou be, on shore or on sea." Said he to
her, "I purpose to recite a Kasidah, an ode, in his praise, that
he may redouble in affection for me." "Thou art right in thine
intent," she answered, "so gather thy wits together and weigh thy
words, and I shall surely see my husband favoured with his
highest favour." Thereupon Hasan shut himself up and composed
these couplets on a solid base and abounding in inner grace and
copies them out in a hand-writing of the nicest taste. They are
as follows:--

Mine is a Chief who reached most haught estate, * Treading the
pathways of the good and great:
His justice makes all regions safe and sure, * And against
froward foes bars every gate:
Bold lion, hero, saint, e'en if you call * Seraph or Sovran
[FN#493] he with all may rate!
The poorest supplicant rich from him returns, * All words to
praise him were inadequate.
He to the day of peace is saffron Morn, * And murky Night in
furious warfare's bate.
Bow 'neath his gifts our necks, and by his deeds * As King of
freeborn [FN#494] souls he 'joys his state:
Allah increase for us his term of years, * And from his lot avert
all risks and fears!

When he had finished transcribing the lines, he despatched them,
in charge of one of his uncle's slaves, to the Sultan, who
perused them and his fancy was pleased; so he read them to those
present and all praised them with the highest praise. Thereupon
he sent for the writer to his sitting-chamber and said to him,
"Thou art from this day forth my boon-companion and I appoint to
thee a monthly solde of a thousand dirhams, over and above that I
bestowed on thee aforetime." So Hasan rose and, kissing the
ground before the King several times, prayed for the continuance
of his greatness and glory and length of life and strength. Thus
Badr al-Din Hasan the Bassorite waxed high in honour and his fame
flew forth to many regions and he abode in all comfort and solace
and delight of life with his uncle and his own folk till Death
overtook him. When the Caliph Harun al-Rashid heard this story
from the mouth of his Wazir, Ja'afar the Barmecide, he marvelled
much and said, "It behoves that these stories be written in
letters of liquid gold." Then he set the slave at liberty and
assigned to the youth who had slain his wife such a monthly
stipend as sufficed to make his life easy; he also gave him a
concubine from amongst his own slave-girls and the young man
became one of his cup-companions. "Yet this story," (continued
Shahrazad) "is in no wise stranger than the tale of the Tailor
and the Hunchback and the Jew and the Reeve and the Nazarene, and
what betided them." Quoth the King, "And what may that be?" So
Shahrazad began, in these words,[FN#495]

THE HUNCHBACK'S TALE.

It hath reached me, O auspicious King, that there dwelt during
times of yore, and years and ages long gone before, in a certain
city of China,[FN#496] a Tailor who was an open handed man that
loved pleasuring and merry making; and who was wont, he and his
wife, to solace themselves from time to time with public
diversions and amusements. One day they went out with the first
of the light and were returning in the evening when they fell in
with a Hunchback, whose semblance would draw a laugh from care
and dispel the horrors of despair. So they went up to enjoy
looking at him and invited him to go home with them and converse
and carouse with them that night. He consented and accompanied
them afoot to their home; whereupon the Tailor fared forth to the
bazaar (night having just set in) and bought a fried fish and
bread and lemons and dry sweetmeats for dessert; and set the
victuals before the Hunchback and they ate. Presently the
Tailor's wife took a great fid of fish and gave it in a gobbet to
the Gobbo, stopping his mouth with her hand and saying, "By
Allah, thou must down with it at a single gulp; and I will not
give thee time to chew it." So he bolted it; but therein was a
stiff bone which stuck in his gullet and, his hour being come, he
died.--And Shahrazad perceived the dawn of day and ceased saying
her permitted say.

When it was the Twenty-fifth Night,

She said, It hath reached me, O auspicious King, that when the
Tailor's wife gave the Hunchback that mouthful of fish which
ended his term of days he died on the instant. Seeing this the
Tailor cried aloud, "There is no Majesty and there is no Might
save in Allah! Alas, that this poor wretch should have died in so
foolish fashion at our hands!" and the woman rejoined, "Why this
idle talk? Hast thou not heard his saying who said:--

Why then waste I my time in grief, until I * find no friend to
bear my weight of woe
How sleep upon a fire that flames unquenched? * Upon the flames
to rest were hard enow!"

Asked her husband, "And what shall I do with him?"; and she
answered, "Rise and take him in thine arms and spread a silken
kerchief over him; then I will fare forth, with thee following me
this very night and if thou meet any one say, 'This is my son,
and his mother and I are carrying him to the doctor that he may
look at him.'" So he rose and taking the Hunchback in his arms
bore him along the streets, preceded by his wife who kept crying,
"O my son, Allah keep thee! what part paineth thee and where hath
this small-pox[FN#497] attacked thee?" So all who saw them said
"'Tis a child sick of small-pox." [FN#498] They went along asking
for the physician's house till folk directed them to that of a
leach which was a Jew. They knocked at the door, and there came
down to them a black slave girl who opened and, seeing a man
bearing a babe, and a woman with him, said to them, "What is the
matter?" "We have a little one with us," answered the Tailor's
wife, "and we wish to show him to the physician: so take this
quarter dinar and give it to thy master and let him come down and
see my son who is sore sick." The girl went up to tell her
master, whereupon the Tailor's wife walked into the vestibule and
said to her husband, "Leave the Hunchback here and let us fly for
our lives." So the Tailor carried the dead man to the top of the
stairs and propped him upright against the wall and ran away, he
and his wife. Meanwhile the girl went in to the Jew and said to
him, "At the door are a man and a woman with a sick child and
they have given me a quarter dinar for thee, that thou mayest go
down and look at the little one and prescribe for it." As soon as
the Jew saw the quarter dinar he rejoiced and rose quickly in his
greed of gain and went forth hurriedly in the dark; but hardly
had he made a step when he stumbled on the corpse and threw it
over, when it rolled to the bottom of the staircase. So he cried
out to the girl to hurry up with the light, and she brought it,
whereupon he went down and examining the Hunchback found that he
was stone dead. So he cried out, "O for Esdras![FN#499] O for
Moses! O for Aaron! O for Joshua, son of Nun! O the Ten
Commandments! I have stumbled against the sick one and he hath
fallen downstairs and he is dead! How shall I get this man I have
killed out of my house? O by the hoofs of the ass of Esdras!"
Then he took up the body and, carrying it into the house, told
his wife what had happened and she said to him, "Why dost thou
sit still? If thou keep him here till day break we shall both
lose our lives. Let us two carry him to the terrace roof and
throw him over into the house of our neighbour, the Moslem, for
if he abide there a night the dogs will come down on him from the
adjoining terraces and eat him up." Now his neighbour was a
Reeve, the controller of the Sultan's kitchen, and was wont to
bring back great store of oil and fat and broken meats; but the
cats and rats used to eat it, or, if the dogs scented a fat
sheep's tail they would come down from the nearest roofs and tear
at it; and on this wise the beasts had already damaged much of
what he brought home. So the Jew and his wife carried the
Hunchback up to the roof; and, letting him down by his hands and
feet through the wind-shaft[FN#500] into the Reeve's house,
propped him up against the wall and went their ways. Hardly had
they done this when the Reeve, who had been passing an evening
with his friends hearing a recitation of the Koran, came home and
opened the door and, going up with a lighted candle, found a son
of Adam standing in the corner under the ventilator. When he saw
this, he said, "Wah! by Allah, very good forsooth! He who robbeth
my stuff is none other than a man." Then he turned to the
Hunchback and said, "So 'tis thou that stealest the meat and the
fat! I thought it was the cats and dogs, and I kill the dogs and
cats of the quarter and sin against them by killing them. And all
the while 'tis thou comest down from the house terrace through
the wind shaft. But I will avenge myself upon thee with my own
hand!" So he snatched up a heavy hammer and set upon him and
smote him full on the breast and he fell down. Then he examined
him and, finding that he was dead, cried out in horror, thinking
that he had killed him, and said, "There is no Majesty and there
is no Might save in Allah, the Glorious, the Great!" And he
feared for his life, and added "Allah curse the oil and the meat
and the grease and the sheep's tails to boot! How hath fate given
this man his quietus at my hand!" Then he looked at the body and
seeing it was that of a Gobbo, said, "Was it not enough for thee
to be a hunchback,[FN#501] but thou must likewise be a thief and
prig flesh and fat! O thou Veiler,[FN#502] deign to veil me with
Thy curtain of concealment!" So he took him up on his shoulders
and, going forth with him from his house about the latter end of
the night, carried him to the nearest end of the bazaar, where he
set him up on his feet against the wall of a shop at the head of
a dark lane, and left him and went away. After a while up came a
Nazarene,[FN#503] the Sultan's broker who, much bemused with
liquor, was purposing for the Hammam bath as his drunkenness
whispered in his ear, "Verily the call to matins[FN#504] is
nigh." He came plodding along and staggering about till he drew
near the Hunchback and squatted down to make water[FN#505] over
against him; when he happened to glance around and saw a man
standing against the wall. Now some person had snatched off the
Christian's turband[FN#506] in the first of the night; so when he
saw the Hunchback hard by he fancied that he also meant to steal
his headdress. Thereupon he clenched his fist and struck him on
the neck, felling him to the ground, and called aloud to the
watchman of the bazaar, and came down on the body in his drunken
fury and kept on belabouring and throttling the corpse. Presently
the Charley came up and, finding a Nazarene kneeling on a Moslem
and frapping him, asked, "What harm hath this one done?"; and the
Broker answered, "The fellow meant to snatch off my turband."
"Get up from him," quoth the watch man. So he arose and the
Charley went up to the Hunchback and finding him dead, exclaimed,
"By Allah, good indeed! A Christian killing a Mahometan!" Then he
seized the Broker and, tying his hands behind his back, carried
him to the Governor's house,[FN#507] and all the while the
Nazarene kept saying to himself, "O Messiah! O Virgin! how came I
to kill this fellow? And in what a hurry he must have been to
depart this life when he died of a single blow!" Presently, as
his drunkenness fled, came dolour in its stead. So the Broker and
the body were kept in the Governor's place till morning morrowed,
when the Wali came out and gave order to hang the supposed
murderer and commanded the executioner[FN#508] make proclamation
of the sentence. Forthwith they set up a gallows under which they
made the Nazarene stand and the torch bearer, who was hangman,
threw the rope round his neck and passed one end through the
pulley, and was about to hoist him up[FN#509] when lo! the Reeve,
who was passing by, saw the Broker about to be hanged; and,
making his way through the people, cried out to the executioner,
"Hold! Hold! I am he who killed the Hunchback!" Asked the
Governor, "What made thee kill him?"; and he answered, "I went
home last night and there found this man who had come down the
ventilator to steal my property; so I smote him with a hammer on
the breast and he died forthright. Then I took him up and carried
him to the bazaar and set him up against the wall in such a place
near such a lane;" adding, "Is it not enough for me to have
killed a Moslem without also killing a Christian? So hang none
other but me." When the Governor heard these words he released
the Broker and said to the torch bearer, "Hang up this man on his
own confession." So he loosed the cord from the Nazarene's neck
and threw it round that of the Reeve and, making him stand under
the gallows tree, was about to string him up when behold, the
Jewish physician pushed through the people and shouted to the
executioner, "Hold! Hold! It was I and none else killed the
Hunchback! Last night I was sitting at home when a man and a
woman knocked at the door carrying this Gobbo who was sick, and
gave my handmaid a quarter dinar, bidding her hand me the fee and
tell me to come down and see him. Whilst she was gone the man and
the woman brought him into the house and, setting him on the
stairs, went away; and presently I came down and not seeing him,
for I was in the dark, stumbled over him and he fell to the foot
of the staircase and died on the moment. Then we took him up, I
and my wife, and carried him on to the top terrace; and, the
house of this Reeve being next door to mine, we let the body down
through the ventilator. When he came home and found the Hunchback
in his house, he fancied he was a thief and struck him with a
hammer, so that he fell to the ground, and our neighbour made
certain that he had slain him. Now is it not enough for me to
have killed one Moslem unwittingly, without burdening myself with
taking the life of another Moslem wittingly?" When the Governor
heard this he said to the hangman, "Set free the Reeve and hang
the Jew." Thereupon the torch bearer took him and slung the cord
round his neck when behold, the Tailor pushed through the people,
and shouted to the executioner, "Hold! Hold! It was I and none
else killed the Hunchback; and this was the fashion thereof. I
had been out a pleasuring yesterday and, coming back to supper,
fell in with this Gobbo, who was drunk and drumming away and
singing lustily to his tambourine. So I accosted him and carried
him to my house and bought a fish, and we sat down to eat.
Presently my wife took a fid of fish and, making a gobbet of
it,[FN#510] crammed it into his mouth; but some of it went down
the wrong way or stuck in his gullet and he died on the instant.
So we lifted him up, I and my wife, and carried him to the Jew's
house where the slave girl came down and opened the door to us
and I said to her, 'Tell thy master that there are a man and a
woman and a sick person for thee to see!' I gave her a quarter
dinar and she went up to tell her master; and, whilst she was
gone, I carried the Hunchback to the head of the staircase and
propped him up against the wall, and went off with my wife. When
the Jew came down he stumbled over him and thought that he had
killed him." Then he asked the Jew, "Is this the truth?"; and the
Jew answered, "Yes." Thereupon the Tailor turned to the Governor,
and said, "Leave go the Jew and hang me." When the Governor heard
the Tailor's tale he marvelled at the matter of this Hunchback
and exclaimed. "Verily this is an adventure which should be
recorded in books!" Then he said to the hangman, "Let the Jew go
and hang the Tailor on his own confession." The executioner took
the Tailor and put the rope around his neck and said, "I am tired
of such slow work: we bring out this one and change him for that
other, and no one is hanged after all!" Now the Hunchback in
question was, they relate, jester to the Sultan of China who
could not bear him out of his sight; so when the fellow got drunk
and did not make his appearance that night or the next day till
noon, the Sultan asked some of his courtiers about him and they
answered, "O our lord, the Governor hath come upon him dead and
hath ordered his murderer to be hanged; but, as the hangman was
about to hoist him up there came a second and a third and a
fourth and each one said, 'It is I, and none else killed the
Hunchback!' and each gave a full and circumstantial account of
the manner of the jester being killed." When the King heard this
he cried aloud to the Chamberlain in waiting, "Go down to the
Governor and bring me all four of them." So the Chamberlain went
down at once to the place of execution, where he found the torch
bearer on the point of hanging the Tailor and shouted to him,
"Hold! Hold!" Then he gave the King's command to the Governor who
took the Tailor, the Jew, the Nazarene and the Reeve (the
Hunchback's body being borne on men's shoulders) and went up with
one and all of them to the King. When he came into the presence,
he kissed the ground and acquainted the ruler with the whole
story which it is needless to relate for, as they say, There is
no avail in a thrice told tale. The Sultan hearing it marvelled
and was moved to mirth and commanded the story to be written in
letters of liquid gold, saying to those present, "Did ye ever
hear a more wondrous tale than that of my Hunchback?" Thereupon
the Nazarene broker came forward and said, "O King of the age,
with thy leave I will tell thee a thing which happened to myself
and which is still more wondrous and marvellous and pleasurable
and delectable than the tale of the Hunchback." Quoth the King
"Tell us what thou hast to say!" So he began in these words

The Nazarene Broker's Story.

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