Maria Edgeworth - "The Life and Letters of Maria Edgeworth, Vol. 2"

Edward J. O'Brien and John Cournos, editors - "The Best British Short Stories of 1922"

Jessie Graham Flower - "Grace Harlowe's Overland Riders Among the Kentucky Mountaineers"

Various - "Journal of the Proceedings of the Linnean Society Vol. 3"

Annual Bibliography of Commonwealth Literature 2007
This paper argues that discourses of love in Ghanaian market literature for youth offer a view into complex negotiations of agency and empowerment. Drawing on Deborah Durham's notion of youth as "social `shifters'" and Francis Nyamnjoh's conception of the "interconnectedness" of agency, I take Ghanaian market literature as one specific case of how African literature for youth foregrounds questions of continuity and change as African societies enter into increasingly complex global relations. In this literature for youth, received notions of love, often constructed out of impressions from American pop and hip hop music, carry new notions of agency that compete with existing "domesticated" forms. Authors like Ike Tandoh and Evelyn Tay employ discourses of love to offer youth alternative avenues for empowerment in a context of socio-economic disenfranchizement. In a creative process of "straddling", this writing both reveals and reproduces the contradictions that obtain in youth configurations of agency.

Real Life In London, Volumes I. and II.

P >> Pierce Egan >> Real Life In London, Volumes I. and II.




1 Hop--A dance.

~96~~were taken to Bow-street, in a nice pickle you may be sure,
dancing-pumps and silk-stockings, after setting in the watch-house all
night, and surrounded by lots of people that hooted and howled, as the
procession passed along, in good style. They were safely landed at the
Brown Bear, from which they were handed over in groups to be examined
by the Magistrate, when the men were discharged upon giving satisfactory
accounts, and the women after some questions being put to them. You see
all this took place because they were dancing in an unlicensed room. It
was altogether a laughable set-out as ever you see'd--the Dandys and
the Dandyzettes--the Exquisites--the Shopmen--the Ladies' maid and the
Prentice Boys--my Lord and his Reverence--mingled up higgledy-piggledy,
pigs in the straw, with Bow-street Officers, Runners and
Watchmen--Ladies squalling and fainting, Men swearing and almost
fighting. It would have been a pleasure to have kick'd up a row that
night, a purpose to get admission--you would have been highly amused,
I'll assure you--good morning, Sir." And thus saying, he turned the lock
upon me, and left me to my meditations. In about a couple of hours
the old woman made her appearance, and prepared me some coffee; and at
eleven o'clock came the Constable of the night, to accompany me before
the Magistrate.

"Aware that the circumstances were rather against me, and that I had no
right to interfere in other persons' business or quarrels, I consulted
him upon the best mode of making up the matter; for although I had
really done no more than becomes a man in protecting a female, I had
certainly infringed upon the law, in effecting the escape of a person in
custody, and consequently was liable to the penalty or penalties in such
cases made and provided. On our arrival at the Brown Bear, I was met
by a genteel-looking man, who delivered me a letter, and immediately
disappeared. Upon breaking the seal, I found its contents as follows:

Dear Sir, Although unknown to me, I have learned enough of your
character to pronounce you a trump, a prime cock, and nothing but a good
one. I am detained by John Doe and Richard Roe with their d----d _fieri
facias_, or I should be with you. However, I trust you will excuse the
liberty I take in requesting you will make use of the enclosed for the
purpose of shaking yourself out of the ~97~~hands of the scouts and
their pals. We shall have some opportunities of meeting, when I will
explain: in the mean time, believe me I am

Your's truly,

Tom.


"With this advice, so consonant with my own opinion, I immediately
complied; and having satisfied the broken-headed Charley, and paid all
expences incurred, I was induced to walk into the office merely to give
a look around me, when by a lucky chance I saw you enter. And thus you
have a full, true, and particular account of the peregrinations of your
humble servant."

Listening with close attention to this narrative of Sparkle's, all other
subjects had escaped observation, till they found themselves in the
Strand.

"Whither are we bound?" inquired Sparkle.

"On a voyage of discoveries," replied Dashall, "and we just wanted you
to act as pilot."

"What place is this?" inquired Bob.

"That," continued Sparkle, "is Somerset-house. It is a fine old
building; it stands on the banks of the Thames, raised on piers and
arches, and is now appropriated to various public offices, and houses
belonging to the various offices of the Government."

"The terrace, which lies on the river, is very fine, and may be well
viewed from Waterloo Bridge. The front in the Strand, you perceive,
has a noble aspect, being composed of a rustic basement, supporting a
Corinthian order of columns crowned with an attic in the centre, and at
the extremities with a balustrade. The south front, which looks into the
court, is very elegant in its composition.

"The basement consists of nine large arches; and three in the centre
open, forming the principal entrance; and three at each end, filled with
windows of the Doric order, are adorned with pilasters, entablatures,
and pediments. On the key-stones of the nine arches are carved, in alto
relievo, nine colossal masks, representing the Ocean, and the eight main
Rivers of England, viz. _Thames, Humber, Mersey, Dee, Medway, Tweed,
Tyne, and Severn_, with appropriate emblems to denote their various
characters.

"Over the basement the Corinthian order consists of ten columns upon
pedestals, having their regular entablature. It comprehends two
floors, and the attic in the centre of the front extends over three
intercolomniations, and is divided into three parts by four colossal
statues placed on ~98~~the columns of the order. It terminates with a
group consisting of the arms of the British empire, supported on one
side by the Genius of England, and by Fame, sounding the trumpet, on the
other. These three open arches in the front form the principal entrance
to the whole of the structure, and lead to an elegant vestibule
decorated with Doric columns.

"The terrace, which fronts the Thames, is spacious, and commands a
beautiful view of part of the river, including Blackfriars, Waterloo,
and Westminster Bridges. It is reared on a grand rustic basement,
having thirty-two spacious arches. The arcade thus formed is judiciously
relieved by projections ornamented with rusticated columns, and the
effect of the whole of the terrace from the water is truly grand and
noble. There is however, at present, no admission for the public to
it; but, in all probability, it will be open to all when the edifice is
completed, which would form one of the finest promenades in the world,
and prove to be one of the first luxuries of the metropolis.

"That statue in the centre is a representation of our late King, George
the Third, with the Thames at his feet, pouring wealth and plenty from
a large Cornucopia. It is executed by Bacon, and has his characteristic
cast of expression. It is in a most ludicrous situation, being placed
behind, and on the brink of a deep area.

"In the vestibule are the rooms of the Royal Society, the Society of
Antiquarians, and the Royal Academy of Arts, all in a very grand and
beautiful style. Over the door of the Royal Academy is a bust of Michael
Angelo; and over the door leading to the Royal Society and Society of
Antiquarians, you will find the bust of Sir Isaac Newton.

"The Government-offices, to which this building is devoted, are objects
of great astonishment to strangers, being at once commodious and
elegant, and worthy the wealth of the nation to which they belong. The
hall of the Navy office is a fine room with two fronts, one facing the
terrace and river, and the other facing the court. On the right is the
Stamp-office: it consists of a multitude of apartments: the room in
which the stamping is executed is very interesting to the curious. On
the left you see the Pay-office of the Navy.

"The principal thing to attract notice in this edifice is 99~~the
solidity and completeness of the workmanship in the masonry, and indeed
in every other part."

After taking a rather prolonged view of this elegant edifice, they again
sallied forth into the Strand, mingling with all the noise and bustle
of a crowded street, where by turns were to be discovered, justling each
other, parsons, lawyers, apothecaries, projectors, excisemen, organists,
picture-sellers, bear and monkey-leaders, fiddlers and bailiffs. The
barber and the chimney-sweeper were however always observed to be
careful in avoiding the touch of each other, as if contamination must be
the inevitable consequence.

"My dear fellow!" exclaimed a tall and well-dressed person, who dragged
the Honourable Tom Dashall on one side--"you are the very person I
wanted--I'm very glad to see you in town again--but I have not a moment
to spare--the blood-hounds are in pursuit--this term will be ended
in two days, then comes the long vacation--liberty without hiring
a horse--you understand--was devilishly afraid of being nabb'd just
now--should have been dished if I had--lend me five shillings--come,
make haste."

"Five shillings, Diddler, when am I to be paid? you remember--' When I
grow rich' was the reply."

"Know--yes, I know all about it--but no matter, I'm not going to settle
accounts just now, so don't detain me, I hate Debtor and Creditor.
Fine sport to-morrow, eh--shall be at the Ring--in cog.--take no
notice--disguised as a Quaker--Obadiah Lankloaks--d----d large beaver
hat, and hide my physog.--Lend me what silver you have, and be quick
about it, for I can't stay--thank you, you're a d----a good fellow,
Tom, a trump--shall now pop into a hack, and drive into another
county--thank ye--good day--by by."

During this harangue, while Tost was counting his silver, the ingenious
Mr. Diddler seized all he had, and whipping it speedily into his pocket,
in a few minutes was out of his sight.

Sparkle observing Dashall looking earnestly after Diddler, approached,
and giving him a lusty slap on the shoulder--"Ha! ha! ha!" exclaimed he,
"what are you done again?"

"I suppose so," said Dashall; "confound the fellow, he is always
borrowing: I never met him in my life but ~100~~he had some immediate
necessity or other to require a loan of a little temporary supply, as he
calls it."

"I wonder," said Sparkle, "that you are so ready to lend, after such
frequent experience--how much does he owe you?"

"Heaven only knows," continued Tom, "for I do not keep account against
him, I must even trust to his honour--so it is useless to stand here
losing our time--Come, let us forward."

"With all my heart,", said Sparkle, "and with permission I propose a
visit to the Bonassus, a peep at St. Paul's, and a chop at Dolly's."

This proposition being highly approved of, they continued their
walk along the Strand, towards Temple Bar, and in a few minutes were
attracted by the appearance of men dressed in the garb of the Yeomen of
the Guards, who appeared active in the distribution of hand-bills, and
surrounded a house on the front of which appeared a long string of high
and distinguished names, as patrons and patronesses of the celebrated
animal called the Bonassus. Crossing the road in their approach to
the door, Tallyho could not help admiring the simple elegance of a
shop-front belonging to a grocer, whose name is Peck.

"Very handsome and tasty, indeed," replied Sparkle; "that combination of
marble and brass has a light and elegant effect: it has no appearance of
being laboured at. The inhabitant of the house I believe is a foreigner,
I think an Italian; but London boasts of some of the most elegant shops
in the world." And by this time they entered the opposite house.




CHAPTER IX

"In London my life is a ring of delight,
In frolics I keep up the day and the night;
I snooze at the Hummums till twelve, perhaps later,
I rattle the bell, and I roar up the Waiter;
'Your Honour,' says he, and he makes me a leg;
He brings me my tea, but I swallow an egg;
For tea in a morning's a slop I renounce,
So I down with a glass of good right cherry-bounce.
With--swearing, tearing--ranting, jaunting--slashing,
smashing--smacking, cracking--rumbling, tumbling
--laughing, quaffing--smoking, joking--swaggering,
Staggering:
So thoughtless, so knowing, so green and so mellow,
This, this is the life of a frolicsome fellow."

~101~~UPON entering the house, and depositing their shilling each to
view this newly discovered animal from the Apalachian mountains of
America, and being supplied with immense long bills descriptive of his
form and powers--"Come along (said Sparkle,) let us have a look at the
most wonderful production of nature--only seventeen months old, five
feet ten inches high, and one of the most fashionable fellows in the
metropolis."

"It should seem so," said Tallyho, "by the long list of friends and
visitors that are detailed in the commencement of the bill of fare."

"Perhaps," said Tom, "there are more Bon asses than one."

"Very likely (continued Sparkle;) but let me tell you the allusion in
this case does not apply, for this animal has nothing of the donkey
about him, and makes no noise, as you will infer from the following
lines in the Bill:

"As the Bonassus does not roar,
His fame is widely known,
For no dumb animal before
Has made such noise in town."

~102~~At this moment the barking of a dog assailed their ears, and
suspended the conversation. Passing onward to the den of the Bonassus,
they found a dark-featured gentleman of middling stature, with his hair,
whiskers, and ears, so bewhitened with powder as to form a complete
contrast with his complexion and a black silk handkerchief which he wore
round his neck, holding a large brown-coloured dog by the collar, in
order to prevent annoyance to the visitors.

"D----n the dog, (exclaimed he) although he is the best tempered
creature in the world, he don't seem to like the appearance of the
Bonassus "--and espying Sparkle, "Ha, my dear fellow! how are you?--I
have not seen you for a long while."

"Why, Sir D--n--ll, I am happy to say I never was better in my
life--allow me to introduce you to my two friends, the Hon. Mr. Dashall,
and Robert Tallyho--Sir D--n--ll Harlequin."

The mutual accompaniments of such an introduction having passed among
them, the Knight, who was upon the moment of departure as they entered,
expressed his approbation of the animal he had been viewing, and,
lugging his puppy by one hand, and his cudgel in the other, wished them
a good morning.

"There is an eccentric man of Title," continued Sparkle.

"I should judge," said Bob, "there was a considerable portion of
eccentricity about him, by his appearance. Is he a Baronet?"

"A Baronet," (replied Sparkle) "no, no, he is no other than a _Quack
Doctor_."{1}

1 Of all the subjects that afford opportunities for the
satiric pen in the Metropolis, perhaps there is none more
abundant or prolific than that of Quackery. Dr. Johnson
observes, that "_cheats can seldom stand long against
laughter_." But if a judgment is really to be formed from
existing facts, it may be supposed that times are so
materially changed since the residence of that able writer
in this sublunary sphere, that the reverse of the position
may with greater propriety be asserted. For such is the
prevailing practice of the present day, that, according to
the opinion of thousands, there is nothing to be done
without a vast deal more of profession and pretence than
actual power, and he who is the best able to bear laughing
at, is the most likely to realize the hopes he entertains of
obtaining celebrity, and of having his labours crowned with
success. Nothing can be more evident than this in the
Medical profession, though there are successful Quacks of
all kinds, and in all situations, to be found in London.
This may truly be called the age of Quackery, from the
abundance of impostors of every kind that prey upon society;
and such as cannot or will not think for themselves, ought
to be guarded in a publication of this nature, against the
fraudulent acts of those persons who make it their business
and profit to deteriorate the health, morals, and amusements
of the public. But, in the present instance, we are speaking
of the Medical Quack only, than which perhaps there is none
more remarkable.

The race of Bossys, Brodrums, Solomons, Perkins, Chamants,
&c. is filled by others of equal notoriety, and no doubt of
equal utility. The Cerfs, the Curries, the Lamerts, the
Ruspinis, the Coopers, and Munroes, are all equally entitled
to public approbation, particularly if we may credit the
letters from the various persons who authenticate the
miraculous cures they have performed in the most inveterate,
we hail almost said, the most impossible, cases. If those
persons are really in existence (and who can doubt it?) they
certainly have occasion to be thankful for their escapes,
and we congratulate them; for in our estimation Quack
Doctors seem to consider the human frame merely as a subject
for experiments, which if successful will secure the
reputation of the practitioner. The acquisition of fame and
fortune is, in the estimation of these philosophers, cheaply
purchased by sacrificing the lives of a few of the vulgar,
to whom they prescribe gratis; and the slavish obedience of
some patients to the Doctor, is really astonishing. It is
said that a convalescent at Bath wrote to his Physician in
London, to know whether he might eat sauce with his pork;
but we have not been able to discover whether he expected an
answer gratis; that would perhaps have been an experiment
not altogether grateful to the Doctor's feelings.

The practice of advertising and billing the town has become
so common, that a man scarcely opens a coal-shed, or a
potatoe-stall, without giving due notice of it in the
newspapers, and distributing hand-bills: and frequently with
great success. But our Doctors, who make no show of their
commodities, have no mode of making themselves known without
it. Hence the quantity of bills thrust into the hand of the
passenger through the streets of London, which divulge the
almost incredible performances of their publishers. A high-
sounding name, such as The Chevalier de diamant, the
Chevalier de Ruspini, or The Medical Board, well bored behind
and before, are perhaps more necessary, with a few paper
puffs--as "palpable hits, my Lord," than either skill or
practice, to obtain notice and secure fame.

The Chevalier de Chamant, who was originally a box-maker,
and a man of genius, considering box-making a plebeian
occupation, was for deducing a logical position, not exactly
perhaps by fair argument, but at all events through the
teeth, and was determined, although he could not, like Dr.
Pangloss, mend the cacology of his friends, at least to give
them an opportunity for plenty of jaw-work. With this
laudable object in view, he obtained a patent for making
artificial teeth of mineral paste; and in his advertisements
condescended not to prove their utility as substitutes for
the real teeth, when decayed or wanting, (this was beneath
his notice, and would have been a piece of mere plebeian
Quackery unworthy of his great genius,) but absolutely
assured the world that his mineral teeth were infinitely
superior to any production of nature, both for mastication
and beauty! How this was relished we know not; but he
declared (and he certainly ought to know) that none but
silly and timid persons would hesitate for one moment to
have their teeth drawn, and substitute his minerals: and it
is wonderful to relate, that although his charges were
enormous, and the operation (as may be supposed) not the
most pleasant, yet people could not resist the ingenious
Chevalier's fascinating and drawing puffs; in consequence of
which he soon became possessed of a large surplus of
capital, with which he determined to speculate in the Funds.

For this purpose he employed old Tom Bish, the Stockbroker,
to purchase stock for the amount; but owing to a sudden
fluctuation in the market, a considerable depreciation took
place between the time of purchase and that of payment; a
circumstance which made the Chevalier grin and show his
teeth: Determining however, not to become a victim to the
fangs of Bulls and Bears, but rather to dive like a duck, he
declared the bargain was not legal, and that he would not be
bound by it. Bish upon this occasion proved a hard-mouthed
customer to the man of teeth, and was not a quiet subject to
be drawn, but brought an action against the mineral monger,
and recovered the debt. Tom's counsel, in stating the case,
observed, that the Defendant would find the law could bite
sharper aud hold tighter than any teeth he could make; and
so it turned out.

The Chevalier de R--sp--ni is another character who has cut
no small figure in this line, but has recently made his
appearance in the Gazette, not exactly on so happy an
occasion as such a circumstance would be to his brother
chip, Dr. D--n--ll, now (we suppose) Sir Francis--though
perhaps equally entitled to the honour of knighthood. The
Chevalier has for some years looked Royalty in the face by
residing opposite Carlton House, and taken every precaution
to let the public know that such an important public
character was there to be found, by displaying his name as
conspicuously as possible on brass plates, &c. so that the
visitors to Carlton House could hardly fail to notice him as
the second greatest Character of that great neighbourhood.
But what could induce so great a man to sport his figure in
the Gazette, is as unaccountable as the means by which he
obtained such happy celebrity. Had it occurred immediately
after the war, it might have been concluded without much
stretch of imagination, that the Chevalier, who prides
himself on his intimacy with all the great men of the day,
had, through the friendship of the Duke of Wellington, made
a contract for the teeth and jaw-bones of all who fell at
the battle of Waterloo, and that by bringing to market so
great a stock at one time, the article had fallen in value,
and left the speculating Chevalier so great a loser as to
cause his bankruptcy. Whether such is the real cause or not,
it is difficult to ascertain what could induce the Chevalier
to descend from his dealings with the head to dabble with
lower commodities.

Among other modes of obtaining notoriety, usually resorted
to by Empirics, the Chevalier used to job a very genteel
carriage and pair, but his management was so excellent, that
the expenses of his equipage were very trifling; for as it
was not intended to run, but merely to stand at the door
like a barker at a broker's shop, or a direction-post, he
had the loan on very moderate terms, the job-master taking
into account that the wind of the cattle was not likely to
be injured, or the wheels rattled to pieces by velocity, or
smashed by any violent concussion.

The Chevalier had a Son, who unfortunately was not endowed
by nature with so much ambition or information as his
father; for, frequently when the carriage has been standing
at the door, he has been seen drinking gin most cordially
with Coachee, without once thinking of the evils of example,
or recollecting that he was one of the family. Papa used to
be very angry on these occasions, because, as he said, it
was letting people know that Coachee was only hired as &job,
and not as a family domestic.

For the great benefit and advantage of the community,
Medical Boards have recently been announced in various parts
of the Metropolis, where, according to the assertions of the
Principals, in their advertisements, every disease incident
to human nature is treated by men of skilful practice; and
among these truly useful establishments, those of Drs.
Cooper, Munro, and Co. of Charlotte house, Blackfriars, and
Woodstock-house, Oxford-road, are not the least conspicuous.
Who these worthies are, it is perhaps difficult to
ascertain. One thing however is certain, that Sir
F----s C----e D--n--ll, M.D. is announced as Treasurer,
therefore there can be no doubt but that all is fair above
board, for

"Brutus is an honourable man,
So are they all--all honourable men."

And where so much skill derived from experience is
exercised, it cannot be doubted but great and important
benefits may result to a liberal and enlightened people. Of
the establishment itself we are informed by a friend, that
having occasion to call on the Treasurer, upon some
business, the door was opened by a copper-coloured servant,
a good-looking young Indian--not a fuscus Hydaspes, but a
serving man of good appearance, who ushered him up stairs,
and introduced him to the front room on the first floor,
where all was quackery, bronze and brass, an electrical
machine, images, pictures and diplomas framed and glazed,
and a table covered with books and papers. In a short time,
a person of very imposing appearance entered the room, with
his hair profusely powdered, and his person, from his chin
to his toes, enveloped in a sort of plaid roquelaure, who,
apologizing for the absence of the Doctor, began to assure
him of his being in the entire confidence of the Board, and
in all probability would have proceeded to the operation of
feeling the pulse in a very short time, had not the visitor
discovered in the features of this disciple of Esculapius a
person he had known in former times. 'Why, good God!'
cried he, 'is that you?--What have you done with the Magic-
lantern, and the Lecture on Heads?--am I right, or am I in
fairy-land?' calling him by his name. It was in vain to
hesitate, it was impossible to escape, the discovery was
complete. It was plain however that the dealer in magical
delusions had not altogether given up the art of
legerdemain, which, perhaps, he finds the most profitable of
the two.

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