Tik Tok of Oz
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L. Frank Baum >> Tik Tok of Oz
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"It will only be necessary to chain this dragon
which Tititi-Hoochoo has sent here, in order to
prevent his reaching us with his claws and teeth."
"He also breathes flames," Kaliko reminded him.
"My nomes are not afraid of fire, nor am I,"
said Ruggedo.
"Well, how about the Army of Oogaboo?"
"Sixteen cowardly officers and Tik-Tok! Why, I
could defeat them single-handed; but I won't try
to. I'll summon my army of nomes to drive the
invaders out of my territory, and if we catch any
of them I intend to stick needles into them until
they hop with pain."
"I hope you won't hurt any of the girls," said
Kaliko.
"I'll hurt 'em all!" roared the angry Metal
Monarch. "And that braying Mule I'll make into
hoof-soup, and feed it to my nomes, that it may
add to their strength."
"Why not be good to the strangers and release
your prisoner, the Shaggy Man's brother?"
suggested Kaliko.
"Never!"
"It may save you a lot of annoyance. And you
don't want the Ugly One."
"I don't want him; that's true. But I won't
allow anybody to order me around. I'm King of the
Nomes and I'm the Metal Monarch, and I shall do as
I please and what I please and when I please!"
With this speech Ruggedo threw his sceptre at
Kaliko's head, aiming it so well that the Royal
Chamberlain had to fall flat upon the floor in
order to escape it. But the Hearer did not see the
sceptre coming and it swept past his head so
closely that it broke off the tip of one of his
long ears. He gave a dreadful yell that quite
startled Ruggedo, and the King was sorry for the
accident because those long ears of the Hearer
were really valuable to him.
So the Nome King forgot to be angry with Kaliko
and ordered his Chamberlain to summon General Guph
and the army of nomes and have them properly
armed. They were then to march to the mouth of the
Tube, where they could seize the travelers as soon
as they appeared.
Chapter Fifteen
The Dragon Defies Danger
Although the journey through the Tube was longer,
this time, than before, it was so much more
comfortable that none of our friends minded it at
all. They talked together most of the time and as
they found the dragon good-natured and fond of the
sound of his own voice they soon became well
acquainted with him and accepted him as a
companion.
"You see," said Shaggy, in his frank way, "Quox
is on our side, and therefore the dragon is a good
fellow. If he happened to be an enemy, instead of
a friend, I am sure I should dislike him very
much, for his breath smells of brimstone, he is
very conceited and he is so strong and fierce that
he would prove a dangerous foe."
"Yes, indeed," returned Quox, who had listened
to this speech with pleasure; "I suppose I am
about as terrible as any living thing. I am glad
you find me conceited, for that proves I know my
good qualities. As for my breath smelling of
brimstone, I really can't help it, and I once met
a man whose breath smelled of onions, which I
consider far worse."
"I don't," said Betsy; "I love onions.
"And I love brimstone," declared the dragon, "so
don't let us quarrel over one another's
peculiarities."
Saying this, he breathed a long breath and shot
a flame fifty feet from his mouth. The brimstone
made Betsy cough, but she remembered about the
onions and said nothing.
They had no idea how far they had gone through
the center of the earth, nor when to expect the
trip to end. At one time the little girl remarked:
"I wonder when we'll reach the bottom of this
hole. And isn't it funny, Shaggy Man, that what is
the bottom to us now, was the top when we fell the
other way?"
"What puzzles me," said Files, "is that we are
able to fall both ways."
"That," announced Tik-Tok, "is be-cause the world
is round."
"Exactly," responded Shaggy. "The machinery in
your head is in fine working order, Tik-Tok. You
know, Betsy, that there is such a thing as the
Attraction of Gravitation, which draws everything
toward the center of the earth. That is why we
fall out of bed, and why everything clings to the
surface of the earth."
"Then why doesn't everyone go on down to
the center of the earth?" inquired the little girl.
"I was afraid you were going to ask me that,"
replied Shaggy in a sad tone. "The reason, my
dear, is that the earth is so solid that other solid
things can't get through it. But when there's a
hole, as there is in this case, we drop right down
to the center of the world."
"Why don't we stop there?" asked Betsy.
"Because we go so fast that we acquire speed
enough to carry us right up to the other end."
"I don't understand that, and it makes my
head ache to try to figure it out," she said after
some thought. "One thing draws us to the center
and another thing pushes us away from it.
But--"
"Don't ask me why, please," interrupted the
Shaggy Man. "If you can't understand it, let it go
at that."
"Do you understand it?" she inquired.
"All the magic isn't in fairyland," he said
gravely. "There's lots of magic in all Nature,
and you may see it as well in the United States,
where you and I once lived, as you can here."
"I never did," she replied.
"Because you were so used to it all that you
didn't realize it was magic. Is anything more
wonderful than to see a flower grow and blossom,
or to get light out of the electricity in the air?
The cows that manufacture milk for us must have
machinery fully as remarkable as that in Tik-Tok's
copper body, and perhaps you've noticed that--"
And then, before Shaggy could finish his speech,
the strong light of day suddenly broke upon them,
grew brighter, and completely enveloped them. The
dragon's claws no longer scraped against the metal
Tube, for he shot into the open air a hundred feet
or more and sailed so far away from the slanting
hole that when he landed it was on the peak of a
mountain and just over the entrance to the many
underground caverns of the Nome King.
Some of the officers tumbled off their seats
when Quox struck the ground, but most of the
dragon's passengers only felt a slight jar. All
were glad to be on solid earth again and they at
once dismounted and began to look about them.
Queerly enough, as soon as they had left the
dragon, the seats that were strapped to the
monster's back disappeared, and this probably
happened because there was no further use for them
and because Quox looked far more dignified in just
his silver scales. Of course he still wore the
forty yards of ribbon around his neck, as well as
the great locket, but these only made him look
"dressed up," as Betsy remarked.
Now the army of nomes had gathered thickly
around the mouth of the Tube, in order to be ready
to capture the band of invaders as soon as they
popped out. There were, indeed, hundreds of nomes
assembled, and they were led by Guph, their most
famous General. But they did not expect the dragon
to fly so high, and he shot out of the Tube so
suddenly that it took them by surprise. When the
nomes had rubbed the astonishment out of their
eyes and regained their wits, they discovered the
dragon quietly seated on the mountainside far
above their heads, while the other strangers were
standing in a group and calmly looking down upon
them.
General Guph was very angry at the escape, which
was no one's fault but his own.
"Come down here and be captured!" he shouted,
waving his sword at them.
"Come up here and capture us--if you dare!"
replied Queen Ann, who was winding up the
clockwork of her Private Soldier, so he could
fight more briskly.
Guph's first answer was a roar of rage at the
defiance; then he turned and issued a command to
his nomes. These were all armed with sharp spears
and with one accord they raised these spears and
threw them straight at their foes, so that they
rushed through the air in a perfect cloud of
flying weapons.
Some damage might have been done had not the
dragon quickly crawled before the others, his body
being so big that it shielded every one of them,
including Hank. The spears rattled against the
silver scales of Quox and then fell harmlessly to
the ground. They were magic spears, of course, and
all straightway bounded back into the hands of
those who had thrown them, but even Guph could see
that it was useless to repeat the attack.
It was now Queen Ann's turn to attack, so the
Generals yelled "For--ward march!" and the
Colonels and Majors and Captains repeated the
command and the valiant Army of Oogaboo,
which seemed to be composed mainly of Tik-
Tok, marched forward in single column toward
the nomes, while Betsy and Polychrome cheered
and Hank gave a loud "Hee-haw!" and Shaggy
shouted "Hooray!" and Queen Ann screamed:
"At 'em, Tik-Tok--at 'em!"
The nomes did not await the Clockwork Man's
attack but in a twinkling disappeared into the
underground caverns. They made a great mistake in
being so hasty, for Tik-Tok had not taken a dozen
steps before he stubbed his copper toe on a rock
and fell flat to the ground, where he cried: "Pick
me up! Pick me up! Pick me up!" until Shaggy and
Files ran forward and raised him to his feet
again.
The dragon chuckled softly to himself as he
scratched his left ear with his hind claw, but no
one was paying much attention to Quox just then.
It was evident to Ann and her officers that
there could be no fighting unless the enemy was
present, and in order to find the enemy they must
boldly enter the underground Kingdom of the nomes.
So bold a step demanded a council of war.
"Don't you think I'd better drop in on Ruggedo
and obey the orders of the Jinjin?" asked Quox.
"By no means!" returned Queen Ann. "We have
already put the army of nomes to flight and all
that yet remains is to force our way into those
caverns, and conquer the Nome King and all his
people."
"That seems to me something of a job," said
the dragon, closing his eyes sleepily. "But go
ahead, if you like, and I'll wait here for you.
Don't be in any hurry on my account. To one
who lives thousands of years the delay of a few
days means nothing at all, and I shall probably
sleep until the time comes for me to act."
Ann was provoked at this speech.
"You may as well go back to Tititi-Hoochoo now,"
she said, "for the Nome King is as good as
conquered already."
But Quox shook his head. "No," said he; "I'll wait."
Chapter Sixteen
The Naughty Nome
Shaggy Man had said nothing during the
conversation between Queen Ann and Quox, for the
simple reason that he did not consider the matter
worth an argument. Safe within his pocket reposed
the Love Magnet, which had never failed to win
every heart. The nomes, he knew, were not like the
heartless Roses and therefore could be won to his
side as soon as he exhibited the magic talisman.
Shaggy's chief anxiety had been to reach
Ruggedo's Kingdom and now that the entrance lay
before him he was confident he would be able to
rescue his lost brother. Let Ann and the dragon
quarrel as to who should conquer the nomes, if
they liked; Shaggy would let them try, and if they
failed he had the means of conquest in his own
pocket.
But Ann was positive she could not fail, for she
thought her Army could do anything. So she called
the officers together and told them how to act,
and she also instructed Tik-Tok what to do and
what to say.
"Please do not shoot your gun except as a last
resort," she added, "for I do not wish to be cruel
or to shed any blood--unless it is absolutely
necessary."
"All right," replied Tik-Tok; "but I do not
think Rug-ge-do would bleed if I filled him full
of holes and put him in a ci-der press."
Then the officers fell in line, the four
Generals abreast and then the four Colonels and
the four Majors and the four Captains. They drew
their glittering swords and commanded Tik-Tok to
march, which he did. Twice he fell down, being
tripped by the rough rocks, but when he struck the
smooth path he got along better. Into the gloomy
mouth of the cavern entrance he stepped without
hesitation, and after him proudly pranced the
officers and Queen Ann. The others held back a
little, waiting to see what would happen.
Of course the Nome King knew they were coming
and was prepared to receive them. Just within the
rocky passage that led to the jeweled throne-room
was a deep pit, which was usually covered. Ruggedo
had ordered the cover removed and it now stood
open, scarcely visible in the gloom.
The pit was so large around that it nearly
filled the passage and there was barely room for
one to walk around it by pressing close to the
rock walls. This Tik-Tok did, for his copper eyes
saw the pit clearly and he avoided it; but the
officers marched straight into the hole and
tumbled in a heap on the bottom. An instant later
Queen Ann also walked into the pit, for she had
her chin in the air and was careless where she
placed her feet. Then one of the nomes pulled a
lever which replaced the cover on the pit and made
the officers of Oogaboo and their Queen fast
prisoners.
As for Tik-Tok, he kept straight on to the
cavern where Ruggedo sat in his throne and there
he faced the Nome King and said:
"I here-by con-quer you in the name of Queen Ann
So-forth of Oo-ga-boo, whose Ar-my I am, and I
de-clare that you are her pris-on-er!"
Ruggedo laughed at him.
"Where is this famous Queen?" he asked.
"She'll be here in a min-ute," said Tik-Tok.
"Per-haps she stopped to tie her shoe-string."
"Now, see here, Tik-Tok," began the Nome King,
in a stern voice, "I've had enough of this
nonsense. Your Queen and her officers are all
prisoners, having fallen into my power, so perhaps
you'll tell me what you mean to do."
"My or-ders were to con-quer you," replied Tik-
Tok, "and my ma-chin-er-y has done the best it
knows how to car-ry out those or-ders."
Ruggedo pounded on his gong and Kaliko appeared,
followed closely by General Guph.
"Take this copper man into the shops and set him
to work hammering gold," commanded the King.
"Being run by machinery he ought to be a steady
worker. He ought never to have been made, but
since he exists I shall hereafter put him to good
use."
"If you try to cap-ture me," said Tik-Tok, "I
shall fight."
"Don't do that!" exclaimed General Guph,
earnestly, "for it will be useless to resist and
you might hurt some one."
But Tik-Tok raised his gun and took aim and not
knowing what damage the gun might do the nomes
were afraid to face it.
While he was thus defying the Nome King and his
high officials, Betsy Bobbin rode calmly into the
royal cavern, seated upon the back of Hank the
mule. The little girl had grown tired of waiting
for "something to happen" and so had come to see
if Ruggedo had been conquered.
"Nails and nuggets!" roared the King; "how
dare you bring that beast here and enter my
presence unannounced?"
"There wasn't anybody to announce me," replied
Betsy. "I guess your folks were all busy. Are you
conquered yet?"
"No!" shouted the King, almost beside himself
with rage.
"Then please give me something to eat, for I'm
awful hungry," said the girl. "You see, this
conquering business is a good deal like waiting
for a circus parade; it takes a long time to get
around and don't amount to much anyhow."
The nomes were so much astonished at this speech
that for a time they could only glare at her
silently, not finding words to reply. The King
finally recovered the use of his tongue and said:
"Earth-crawler! this insolence to my majesty
shall be your death-warrant. You are an ordinary
mortal, and to stop a mortal from living is so
easy a thing to do that I will not keep you
waiting half so long as you did for my conquest."
"I'd rather you wouldn't stop me from living,"
remarked Betsy, getting off Hank's back and
standing beside him. "And it would be a pretty
cheap King who killed a visitor while she was
hungry. If you'll give me something to eat, I'll
talk this killing business over with you
afterward; only, I warn you now that I don't
approve of it, and never will."
Her coolness and lack of fear impressed the Nome
King, although he bore an intense hatred toward
all mortals.
"What do you wish to eat?" he asked gruffly.
"Oh, a ham-sandwich would do, or perhaps a
couple of hard-boiled eggs--"
"Eggs!" shrieked the three nomes who were
present, shuddering till their teeth chattered.
"What's the matter?" asked Betsy wonderingly.
"Are eggs as high here as they are at home?"
"Guph," said the King in an agitated voice,
turning to his General, "let us destroy this rash
mortal at once! Seize her and take her to the
Slimy Cave and lock her in."
Guph glanced at Tik-Tok, whose gun was still
pointed, but just then Kaliko stole softly behind
the copper man and kicked his knee-joints so that
they suddenly bent forward and tumbled Tik-Tok to
the floor, his gun falling from his grasp.
Then Guph, seeing Tik-Tok helpless, made a grab
at Betsy. At the same time Hank's heels shot out
and caught the General just where his belt was
buckled. He rose into the air swift as a cannon-
ball, struck the Nome King fairly and flattened
his Majesty against the wall of rock on the
opposite side of the cavern. Together they fell to
the floor in a dazed and crumpled condition,
seeing which Kaliko whispered to Betsy:
"Come with me--quick!--and I will save you."
She looked into Kaliko's face inquiringly and
thought he seemed honest and good-natured, so
she decided to follow him. He led her and the
mule through several passages and into a small
cavern very nicely and comfortably furnished.
"This is my own room," said he, "but you are
quite welcome to use it. Wait here a minute and
I'll get you something to eat."
When Kaliko returned he brought a tray
containing some broiled mushrooms, a loaf of
mineral bread and some petroleum-butter. The
butter Betsy could not eat, but the bread was good
and the mushrooms delicious.
"Here's the door key," said Kaliko, "and you'd
better lock yourself in."
"Won't you let Polychrome and the Rose Princess
come here, too?" she asked.
"I'll see. Where are they?"
"I don't know. I left them outside," said Betsy.
"Well, if you hear three raps on the door, open
it," said Kaliko; "but don't let anyone in unless
they give the three raps."
"All right," promised Betsy, and when Kaliko
left the cosy cavern she closed and locked the
door.
In the meantime Ann and her officers, finding
themselves prisoners in the pit, had shouted and
screamed until they were tired out, but no one had
come to their assistance. It was very dark and
damp in the pit and they could not climb out
because the walls were higher than their heads and
the cover was on. The Queen was first angry and
then annoyed and then discouraged; but the
officers were only afraid. Every one of the poor
fellows heartily wished he was back in Oogaboo
caring for his orchard, and some were so unhappy
that they began to reproach Ann for causing them
all this trouble and danger.
Finally the Queen sat down on the bottom of the
pit and leaned her back against the wall. By good
luck her sharp elbow touched a secret spring in
the wall and a big flat rock swung inward. Ann
fell over backward, but the next instant she
jumped up and cried to the others:
"A passage! A passage! Follow me, my brave men,
and we may yet escape."
Then she began to crawl through the passage,
which was as dark and dank as the pit, and the
officers followed her in single file. They
crawled, and they crawled, and they kept on
crawling, for the passage was not big enough to
allow them to stand upright. It turned this way
and twisted that, sometimes like a corkscrew and
sometimes zigzag, but seldom ran for long in a
straight line.
"It will never end--never!" moaned the officers,
who were rubbing all the skin off their knees on
the rough rocks.
"It must end," retorted Ann courageously, "or
it never would have been made. We don't know
where it will lead us to, but any place is better
than that loathsome pit."
So she crawled on, and the officers crawled on,
and while they were crawling through this awful
underground passage Polychrome and Shaggy and
Files and the Rose Princess, who were standing
outside the entrance to Ruggedo's domains, were
wondering what had become of them.
Chapter Seventeen
A Tragic Transformation
"Don't let us worry," said Shaggy to his
companions, "for it may take the Queen some time
to conquer the Metal Monarch, as Tik-Tok has to do
everything in his slow, mechanical way."
"Do you suppose they are likely to fail?" asked
the Rose Princess.
"I do, indeed," replied Shaggy. "This Nome King
is really a powerful fellow and has a legion of
nomes to assist him, whereas our bold Queen
commands a Clockwork Man and a band of faint-
hearted officers."
"She ought to have let Quox do the conquering,"
said Polychrome, dancing lightly upon a point of
rock and fluttering her beautiful draperies. "But
perhaps the dragon was wise to let her go first,
for when she fails to conquer Ruggedo she may
become more modest in her ambitions."
"Where is the dragon now?" inquired Ozga.
"Up there on the rocks," replied Files. "Look,
my dear; you may see him from here. He said he
would take a little nap while we were mixing up
with Ruggedo, and he added that after we had
gotten into trouble he would wake up and conquer
the Nome King in a jiffy, as his master the Jinjin
has ordered him to do."
"Quox means well," said Shaggy, "but I do not
think we shall need his services; for just as soon
as I am satisfied that Queen Ann and her army have
failed to conquer Ruggedo, I shall enter the
caverns and show the King my Love Magnet. That he
cannot resist; therefore the conquest will be made
with ease."
This speech of Shaggy Man's was overheard by the
Long-Eared Hearer, who was at that moment standing
by Ruggedo's side. For when the King and Guph had
recovered from Hank's kick and had picked
themselves up, their first act was to turn Tik-Tok
on his back and put a heavy diamond on top of him,
so that he could not get up again. Then they
carefully put his gun in a corner of the cavern
and the King sent Guph to fetch the Long-Eared
Hearer.
The Hearer was still angry at Ruggedo for
breaking his ear, but he acknowledged the Nome
King to be his master and was ready to obey his
commands. Therefore he repeated Shaggy's speech to
the King, who at once realized that his Kingdom
was in grave danger. For Ruggedo knew of the Love
Magnet and its powers and was horrified at the
thought that Shaggy might show him the magic
talisman and turn all the hatred in his heart into
love. Ruggedo was proud of his hatred and abhorred
love of any sort.
"Really," said he, "I'd rather he conquered and
lose my wealth and my Kingdom than gaze at that
awful Love Magnet. What can I do to prevent the
Shaggy Man from taking it out of his pocket?"
Kaliko returned to the cavern in time to
overhear this question, and being a loyal nome and
eager to serve his King, he answered by saying:
"If we can manage to bind the Shaggy Man's arms,
tight to his body, he could not get the Love
Magnet out of his pocket."
"True!" cried the King in delight at this easy
solution of the problem. "Get at once a dozen
nomes, with ropes, and place them in the passage
where they can seize and bind Shaggy as soon as he
enters."
This Kaliko did, and meanwhile the watchers
outside the entrance were growing more and more
uneasy about their friends.
"I don't worry so much about the Oogaboo
people," said Polychrome, who had grown sober with
waiting, and perhaps a little nervous, "for they
could not be killed, even though Ruggedo might
cause them much suffering and perhaps destroy them
utterly. But we should not have allowed Betsy and
Hank to go alone into the caverns. The little girl
is mortal and possesses no magic powers whatever,
so if Ruggedo captures her she will be wholly at
his mercy."
"That is indeed true," replied Shaggy. "I
wouldn't like to have anything happen to dear
little Betsy, so I believe I'll go in right away
and put an end to all this worry."
"We may as well go with you," asserted Files,
"for by means of the Love Magnet, you can soon
bring the Nome King to reason."
So it was decided to wait no longer. Shaggy
walked through the entrance first, and after him
came the others. They had no thought of danger to
themselves, and Shaggy, who was going along with
his hands thrust into his pockets, was much
surprised when a rope shot out from the darkness
and twined around his body, pinning down his arms
so securely that he could not even withdraw his
hands from the pockets. Then appeared several
grinning nomes, who speedily tied knots in the
ropes and then led the prisoner along the passage
to the cavern. No attention was paid to the
others, but Files and the Princess followed on
after Shaggy, determined not to desert their
friend and hoping that an opportunity might arise
to rescue him.
As for Polychrome, as soon as she saw that
trouble had overtaken Shaggy she turned and ran
lightly back through the passage and out of the
entrance. Then she easily leaped from rock to rock
until she paused beside the great dragon, who lay
fast asleep.
"Wake up, Quox!" she cried. "It is time for you
to act."
But Quox did not wake up. He lay as one in a
trance, absolutely motionless, with his enormous
eyes tight closed. The eyelids had big silver
scales on them, like all the rest of his body.
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