Strife and Peace
F >>
Fredrika Bremer >> Strife and Peace
Pages:
1 |
2 |
3 |
4 |
5 |
6 |
7 |
8 |
9 |
10 | 11 |
12 |
13
"Susanna! gracious Heaven!" exclaimed now two voices at once; and,
strong with terror and surprise, sprang up Mrs. Astrid and Harald, and
embraced Susanna. She sank more and more together. She seized the hands
of her mistress and of Harald, and said with great difficulty, earnestly
praying--"My little Hulda! The fatherless ... motherless ... think of
her!"
"Susanna! my good, dear child!" exclaimed Mrs. Astrid, "thou wilt not,
thou shalt not now die!" And for the first time fell a beam of anxious
love from her dark eyes upon the young, devoted maiden. It was the first
time that Susanna had enjoyed such a glance, and she looked up as
joyfully as if she had gazed into the opened heaven.
"Oh, Harald!" said Susanna, while she gazed at him with inexpressible
tenderness and clearness, "I know that I could not make you happy in
life, but I thank God that I can die for you. Now--now despise not my
love!"--and seizing his hand and that of her mistress, she pressed them
to her bosom, saying, with a sobbing voice, "Pardon my fault, for--my
love's sake!"
A slight shiver passed through her frame, her head sank upon her breast.
Without a sign of life, they laid Susanna by her mistress, who held her
in her arms, and bathed with her tears the young, pallid countenance.
FOOTNOTES:
[18] "Lefse" are thin cakes of dough, which are cut in pieces and baked.
THE AWAKENING.
I woke, for life assumed victorious sway,
And found my being in its weakness lay.
There the beloved ones round my couch I saw.
REIN.
Months went on, and life was for Susanna merely a wild, uneasy dream. In
the delirious fantasies of fever she again lived over the impressions of
the mountain journey, but in darker colours. She saw the subterranean
spirits, how in terrible shapes they raged about in the now wilderness,
and sought to suffocate her beneath piles of snow and ice, which they
flung upon her. Susanna combated with desperate exertions against them,
for she knew that if she fell, the defence for those she loved would be
taken away, and that the subterranean ones could seize upon it; and
therefore any mass of snow which the spirits cast upon her, she cast
back upon them. Finally, the subterranean ones desired a parley, and
promised that if she would voluntarily accompany them, they would permit
her friends to be at peace; yes, even heap upon them wealth and
happiness. Then strove Susanna no longer; but saluting the beautiful
heaven, and earth with its green dales and beloved people, whom she
should behold no more, let herself be dragged down in silence by the
spirits, into their subterranean dwellings, and experienced there
inexpressible torments. But she was contented to suffer for those she
loved; and out of the dark, cold abyss, where she was doomed to dwell,
she sent up the most affectionate, moving farewells to her Hulda, to her
mistress, to Harald, and Alette, revealing thereby, unknown, to herself,
all her heart's secrets, conflicts, and sufferings.
One day it seemed to her that she had already dwelt hundreds of years in
the under world, and she was now in their church, for her time was up,
and she should now die, and in death (that she knew) should she be
delivered from the power of the mountain spirits. But she could feel no
joy over this, so faint was her heart, so chilled was her bosom. She lay
stretched out upon a stone floor, and over her vaulted itself a roof of
ice. That was her funeral vault, and there should she die. And by
degrees all feelings and senses grew benumbed, all torments vanished,
and there came a sleep so deep, but so secret and peaceful, that
Susanna, who still retained her consciousness, regarded death as a
salutary repose, and wished not to awaken. But it seemed to her that the
door of the vault opened, and she saw a light, like that of the sun; and
some one approached her, and touched her lips with a flame--a flame as
of life. Then beat her heart more rapidly, the blood streamed warmly
through her veins, and she looked up and saw a female figure stand by
her pillow, which bent over her with a look full of love and compassion.
The look, the beautiful life-giving look, Susanna seemed to have seen
some time before, and the longer she gazed on the face of this female
shape, the better she seemed to recognise familiar features--the noble
and beloved features of her mistress. But she looked younger and fairer
than formerly. At her feet she saw roses standing, and the sun shone
upon them; but all appeared to her so beautiful, so wonderful, that she
involuntarily whispered:
"Are we now in heaven?"
"Still on the earth," replied a voice, full of tenderness. "Thou wilt
here live for those who love thee."
"Ah! who loves me?" said Susanna, faint and spiritless.
"I!" answered the voice; "I and others. But be calm and quiet--a mother
watches over thee."
And Susanna continued calm and quiet, and resigned herself, in her great
state of weakness, with gratified confidence to the motherly guardian.
Mrs. Astrid's presence, the mere sound of her light tread, the mere
sight of her shadow, operated beneficially on her mind; all that she
received from her hand was to her delicious and healing. There arose
between them a relationship full of pleasantness. Mrs. Astrid, who saw
the young girl as it were born anew under her hands, conceived for her
an attachment which surprised herself, much as it made her happy. The
strong and healthy Susanna had stood too distant from her; the weak, and
in her weakness the so child-like affectionate one, had stolen into her
heart, and she felt her heart thereby bloom, as it were, anew.
Such is the operation of all true devotion, all true affection, and that
in every stage of life; for affection is the summer of life and of the
heart.
So soon as strength and clear memory again revived in Susanna, she
begged to be informed of the fate of all those who had made the mountain
journey. With astonishment and joy did she then learn how Mrs. Astrid
had discovered in Harald her sister's son; and how, by this, much
darkness had vanished from her life.
Through Sergeant Roenn, and the subsequent inquiries to which his
statement led, within a short time perfect clearness was obtained on all
that concerned the circumstances of Harald's childhood. It was then
discovered that Mr. K. had been a confidant of Colonel Hjelm's, and was
of a sufficiently worthless character to enter, for the sake of gain,
into the plans of the Colonel, and to receive Harald, and cause him by
degrees to forget his former circumstances. Sickness came in aid of
severe treatment; and after a sojourn of some months in K.'s house, he
found the poor boy so much stupified, that he could, without fear of the
betrayal of the secret, yield to the solicitations of Mr. Bergman, and
make over to him a child whose daily aspect was a torment to him. But we
return now to the present.
Harald, under skilful medical care in Bergen, after the mountain
journey, was quickly restored to health. When he had attended the
marriage of Alette, he had travelled abroad, but would, in the course of
the summer, return to Semb, where he would settle down, in order to live
for the beloved relative whom he had again discovered.
The guide, the honest old peasant of Hailing, had met with his death on
the mountains. His grandson wept by his corpse till he was himself half
dead with hunger and cold, when the people from the dales, sent by Mrs.
Astrid and Harald, succeeded in making a way through the snow-drifts to
the Bjoeroeja-saeter, and in rescuing him.
Susanna dropt a tear for the old man's fate, but felt within her a
secret regret not to have died like him. She looked towards the future
with disquiet. But when she could again leave her bed, when Mrs. Astrid
drove her out with her, when she felt the vernal air, and saw the sea,
and the clear heaven above the mountains, and the green orchards at
their feet; then awoke she again vividly to the feeling of the beauty of
the earth, and of life. And she contemplated with admiration and delight
the new objects which surrounded her, as well the magnificent forms of
nature, as the life and the changing scenes in the city; for Susanna
found herself in the lovely and splendidly situated Bergen, the greatest
mercantile city of Norway, the birthplace of Hollberg, Dahl, and Ole
Bull.
Yet would she speedily separate herself from all this, and what was
still harder, from her adored mistress; for Susanna had firmly
determined never again to see Harald. Crimson blushes covered her cheeks
when she recollected her confession in the mountains, at the moment when
she thought herself at the point of death, and she felt that after this
they could not meet, much less live in the same house without mutually
painful embarrassment. She would, therefore, not return again to Semb;
but, so soon as her health would permit it, would go from Bergen by sea
to Sweden, to her native town again, and there, in the bosom of her
little darling, seek to heal her own heart, and draw new strength to
live and labour.
But it was not easy for poor Susanna to announce this resolve to her
mistress. She trembled violently, and could not restrain her tears.
It was at the same time calming and disturbing to her feelings, when
Mrs. Astrid, after she had quietly listened to Susanna, answered with
much composure--
"You are at liberty, Susanna, to act as you find it best; but in three
or four months, for so long will my affairs yet retain me here--in a few
months I shall again return, to Semb, and it would be a trial to me to
be without you on the journey."
"Then I shall accompany you," replied Susanna, glad that she was needed,
"but then ..."
"Then," began again Mrs. Astrid, "when you will leave me, I shall
arrange for your safe return to your native place."
"So then yet some months!" thought Susanna with a melancholy pleasure.
And these months were for her inexpressibly pleasant and strengthening.
Mrs. Astrid occupied herself much with her, and sought in many
particulars to supply the defects of her neglected education. And
Susanna was a quick pupil, and more affectionately than ever did she
attach herself to her mistress, while she on her part experienced even
more and more the truth of the adage: "the breath of youth is
wholesome."
In the beginning of the month of July, Mrs. Astrid travelled again with
Susanna over the mountains which had once threatened them with death;
but at this season of the year, the journey was not dangerous, though
always laborious. Mrs. Astrid was the whole time in the highest spirits,
and seemed every day to become more joyous. Susanna's mood of mind, on
the contrary, became every day more depressed. Even Mrs. Astrid's gaiety
contributed to this. She felt herself infinitely solitary.
It was a beautiful July evening when they descended into Heimdal.
Susanna's heart swelled with sadness as she saw again the places and the
objects which were so dear to her, and which she should now soon quit
for ever. Never had they struck her as so enchanting. She saw the sun's
beams fall on the Kristallberg, and she called to mind Harald's sagas;
she saw the grove of oaks where Mrs. Astrid had sate and had enjoyed the
fragrance which Susanna's hand had prepared for her in silence. And the
spring where the silver-weed and the ladies-mantle grew, the clear
spring where she had spent so many happy hours; Susanna seemed to
_thirst_ for it. The windows in Semb burned with the radiance of the
sun, the house seemed to be illuminated;--in that house she had worked
and ordered; there she had loved; there the flame of the winter evenings
had burned so brightly during Harald's stories. Silently ascended the
pillars of smoke from the cottages in the dale, where she was at home,
knew each child and each cow, knew the cares and the joys which dwelt
there, and where she had first learned rightly to comprehend Harald's
good-heartedness--always Harald--always did she find his image as the
heart in all these reminiscences. But now--- now should she soon leave
all this, all that was beautiful and dear!
They arrived now in Semb, and were greeted by Alfiero with barkings of
clamorous delight.--Susanna, with a tear in her eye, greeted and nodded
to all beloved acquaintances, both people and animals.
The windows in Mrs. Astrid's room stood open, and through them were seen
charming prospects over the dale, with its azure stream, its green
heights and slopes, and the peaceful spire of its church in the
background. She herself stood, as in astonishment, at the beauty of the
grove, and her eyes flashed as she exclaimed--
"See, Susanna! Is not our dale beautiful? And will it not be beautiful
to live here, to make men happy, and be happy oneself?"
Susanna answered with a hasty Yes, and left the room. She felt herself
ready to choke, and yet once more arose Barbra in her, and spoke thus--
"Beautiful? Yes, for her. She thinks not of me; troubles herself not the
least about me! Nor Harald neither! The poor maid-servant, whom they had
need of in the mountain journey is superfluous in the dale. She may go;
they are happy now; they are sufficient to themselves. Whether I live or
die, or suffer, it is indifferent to them. Good, I will therefore no
longer trouble them. I will go, go far, far from here. I will trouble
myself no farther about them; I will forget them as they forget me."
But tears notwithstanding rolled involuntarily over Susanna's cheeks,
and the Barbra wrath ran away with them, and Sanna resumed--
"Yes, I will go: but I will bless them wherever I go. May they find a
maid equally faithful, equally devoted! May they never miss Susanna! And
then, my little Hulda, then my darling and sole joy, soon will I come to
thee. I will take thee into my arms, and carry thee to some still
corner, where undisturbed I may labour for thee. A bit of bread and a
quiet home, I shall find sufficient for us both. And when my heart
aches, I will clasp thee to me, thou little soft child, and thank God
that I have yet some one on earth whom I can love, and who loves me!"
Just as Susanna finished this ejaculation, she was at the door of her
room. She opened it--entered--and stood dumb with astonishment. Were her
senses yet confused, or did she now first wake out of year-long dreams?
She saw herself again in that little room in which she had spent so many
years of her youth, in that little room which she herself had fitted
up, had painted and embellished, and had often described to Harald;--and
there by the window stood the little Hulda's bed, with its flowery
coverlet, and blue muslin hangings. This scene caused the blood to rush
violently to Susanna's heart, and, out of herself, she cried--"Hulda! my
little Hulda!"
"Here I am, Sanna! Here is thy little Hulda!" answered the clear joyous
voice of a child, and the coverlet of the bed moved, and an angelically
beautiful child's head peeped out, and two small white arms stretched
themselves towards Susanna. With a cry of almost wild joy Susanna sprang
forward, and clasped the little sister in her arms.
Susanna was pale, wept and laughed, and knew not for some time what went
on around her. But when she had collected herself, she found herself
sitting on Hulda's bed, with the child folded in her arms, and over the
little, light-locked head, lifted itself a manly one, with an expression
of deep seriousness and gentle emotion.
"Entreat, Susanna, little Hulda," said Harald, "that she bestow a little
regard on me, and that she does not say nay to what you have granted me;
beg that I may call little Hulda my daughter, and that I may call your
Susanna, my Susanna!"
"Oh, yes! That shalt thou, Susanna!" exclaimed little Hulda, while she,
with child-like affection, threw her arms about Susanna's neck, and
continued zealously: "Oh, do like him, Susanna! He likes thee so much;
that he has told me so often, and he has himself brought me hither to
give thee joy. And seest thou this beautiful necklace he has given me,
and he has promised to tell me such pleasant stories in winter. He can
tell so many, do you know! Hast thou heard about Rypan in Justedale,
Sanna? He has told me that! And about the good lady who went about after
the Black Death, and collected all the motherless little children, and
was a mother to them. Oh, Sanna! Do like him, and let him be my father!"
Susanna let the little prattler go on without being able to say a word.
She buried her face in her bosom, and endeavoured to collect her
confused thoughts.
"Susanna," prayed Harald, restlessly and tenderly. "Look at me! Speak to
me a kind word!"
Then raised Susanna her burning and tear-bathed countenance, saying,
"Oh! how shall I ever be able to thank you?"
"How?" said Harold. "By making me happy, Susanna. By becoming my wife."
Susanna stood up, while she said with as much candour as cordiality,
"God knows best how happy I should feel myself, if I could believe--if
words were spoken for your own sake, and not merely for mine. But, ah! I
cannot do it. I know that it is your generosity and goodness----"
"Generosity? Then am I right generous towards myself. For I assure you,
Susanna, that I never thought more of my own advantage than at this
moment; that I am now as completely egotistical as you could desire."
"And your sister Alette," continued Susanna, with downcast eyes; "I know
that she does not wish to call me her sister, and----"
"And since Alette once was so stupid," said now a friendly female voice,
"therefore is she here to deprecate it." And Alette embraced heartily
the astonished Susanna, whilst she continued--"Oh, Susanna! without you
I should now no longer have a brother. I know you better now, and I have
read in the depths of his heart and know that he can now no longer be
happy but through you. Therefore I implore you, Susanna, implore you
earnestly, to make him happy. Be his wife, Susanna, and be my sister."
"And you, too, Alette," said Susanna, deeply moved; "will you too
mislead me with your sweet words? Ah! could you make me forget that it
is my weakness----that is, I who, through my confession have called
forth---- But that can I never; and therefore can I not believe you, ye
good, ye noble ones! And therefore I implore and adjure you----"
"What fine speeches are making here?" now interrupted a solemn voice,
and Mrs. Astrid stood before the affectionately contending group, and
spoke thus with an assumed sternness. "I will hope that my young
relatives and my daughter Susanna do not take upon them to transact and
to determine important affairs without taking me into the council. But
yes, I perceive by your guilty countenances that this is the fact; and
therefore I shall punish you altogether. Not another word of the
business then till eight days are over; and then I demand and require,
as lady and mistress of this house, that the dispute be brought before
me, and that I have a word to say in the decision. Susanna remains here
in the mean time in safe keeping, and I myself shall undertake to watch
her. Dost thou believe seriously, Susanna," and Mrs. Astrid's voice
changed into the most affectionate tones, while she clasped the young
maiden in her arms, "dost thou believe that thou canst so easily escape
me? No, no, my child! Thou deceivest thyself there. Since thou hast
saved our lives, thou hast become our life-captive--thou, and with thy
little Hulda! But supper is laid under the lime-trees in the garden, my
child; and let us gather strength from it for the approaching strife."
THE LAST STRIFE.
The winged troops hie
From the black woods outpouring;
Under them fly
Storms and waves roaring.
Over them waken
Mild stars, and beckon
The troop to the sheltering palms.
AUTUMN SONG, BY VELHAVEN.
There is on earth much sorrow and much darkness; there is crime and
sickness,--the shriek of despair, and the deep, long, silent torture.
Ah! who can name them all, the sufferings of humanity, in their
manifold, pale dispensations? But, God be praised! there is also an
affluence of goodness and joy; there are noble deeds, fulfilled hopes,
moments of rapture, decades of blissful peace, bright marriage-days, and
calm, holy death-beds.
Three months after the strife just mentioned, there was solemnised at
Semb, in Heimdal, one of those bright wedding-days, when the suns of
nature and of men's hearts combined to call forth on earth a paradise,
which is always to be found there, though frequently hidden, fettered,
deeply bound by the subterranean powers.
Yet from the faces of the fallen shine out
The lofty features of their heavenly birth,
And Daphne's heart beats 'neath the rugged bark.
TEGNER.
It was an autumn day, but one of those autumn days when a sun warm as
summer and a crystally pure air cause the earth to stand forth in the
brightest splendour before the azure-blue eyes of heaven; when Nature
resembles a novice, who adorns herself the most at the moment that she
is about to take the nun's veil, and to descend into her winterly grave.
The heights of the dale shone in the most gorgeous play of colours. The
dark pines, the soft-green firs, the golden-tinged birches, the hazels
with their pale leaves, and the mountain ashes with their bunches of
scarlet berries, arranged themselves on these in a variety of changing
masses; while the Heimdal river, intoxicated with the floods of heaven,
roared onward more impetuous and powerful than ever. Many-coloured
herds, which had returned fat and plump from the Saeters, wandered on its
green banks. The chapel-bells rung joyously in the clear air, while the
church-going people streamed along the winding footpath from their
cottages towards the house of God. From the margin of the river at Semb
ran a little fleet of festally adorned boats. In the most stately of
these sate, under a canopy of leaves and flowers, the Lady of Semb; but
no longer the pale, sorrowful one, whose glances seemed to seek the
grave. A new youth appeared now to play upon her cheeks, to breathe upon
her lips, while the clear eyes, with a glad and quiet enjoyment, gazed
around her, now on the beauties of nature, and now on a more beautiful
sight which she had immediately before her eyes--a happy human pair.
Near her, more like a little angel than a mortal child, sate little
Hulda, with a wreath of the flowers called by the Norwegians
"thousand-peace," in her bright locks. All looks, however--as they
ought--were fixed on the bride and bridegroom; and both were, in truth,
handsome and charming to look upon; the more so, because they appeared
so perfectly happy. In a following boat was seen a little strife between
a young lady and her husband, who would wrap round her a cloak, which
she would not willingly have. The spectators were tempted to take part
with him in his tender care for the young wife, who was soon to become a
mother. The issue of this strife was, that--Alf got the upper hand of
Alette. Other boats contained other wedding guests. The men who rowed
the boats had all wreaths round their yellow straw hats. And thus so
advanced the little fleet, amid joyous music, along the river to the
chapel.
The chapel was a simple building, without any other ornament than a
beautiful altar-piece, and an abundance of flowers and green branches,
which now, for the occasion, adorned the seats, the walls, and the
floor.
The sermon was simple and cordial, the singing pure; in a word, no
dissonant tone came hither to disturb the devotion which the arrangement
of divine service in Norway is so well adapted to call forth and
maintain.[19]
Here Harald and Susanna called on heaven, from faithful and earnest
hearts, to bless their sincere intention, in joy and in trouble on the
earth, to love one another, and were declared by the congregation to be
a pair.
Many people had come this day to church; and when the wedding-train
returned homewards, many boats joined themselves to it, and followed it
to the opposite shore with singing and loud huzzas.
But Susanna did not feel herself truly calm and happy till in Mrs.
Astrid's quiet room she had bowed her forehead on her knee, and had felt
her maternal hands laid in blessing upon her head. Her heart was so full
of gratitude it seemed ready to burst.
"I have then a mother!" she exclaimed, as she embraced Mrs. Astrid's
knees, and looked up to her with the warmest and most child-like
affection;--"Ah! I am too happy, far too happy! God has given me, the
poor solitary one, a home and a mother----"
"And a husband, too! Forget him not, I beseech! He too will be
included!" said Harald, as he gently embraced Susanna, and also bent his
knee before the maternal friend.
Mrs. Astrid clasped them both warmly in her arms, and said, with a
still, inward voice, as she went with them to the window, whence was
seen the beautiful dale in all its whole extent: We begin to-day
together a new life, and we will together endeavour to make it happy. At
this moment when I stand, surrounded by you, my children, and looking
forward as it were into a beautiful future, I seem to myself so well to
understand how that may be. We have not here the treasures of art; we
have not the life of the great world, with its varying scenes to enliven
and entertain us; but our lives need not therefore be heavy and
earth-bound. We have Heaven, and we have--Nature! We will call down the
former into our hearts and into our home, and we will inquire of the
latter concerning its silent wonders, and through their contemplation
elevate our spirits. By the flame of our quiet hearth we will sometimes
contemplate the movements of the great world-drama, in order thereafter
with the greater joy to return to our own little scene, and consider how
we can best, each of us play out our part. "And I promise you
beforehand," continued Mrs. Astrid, assuming a playful tone, "that mine
shall not be, to make so long a speech as now."
Pages:
1 |
2 |
3 |
4 |
5 |
6 |
7 |
8 |
9 |
10 | 11 |
12 |
13